239. Lies of Modesty
Female by Design
Francie Winslow
4.9 • 686 Ratings
🗓️ 13 October 2025
⏱️ 20 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
If you grew up in church communities shaped by evangelical or conservative values, chances are you were taught a version of modesty that sounded holy — but left you feeling ashamed, disconnected from your body, or even afraid of your own beauty.
In this episode, we're naming what many of us lived: the modesty messages that told us our bodies were dangerous, that our presence might cause someone else to stumble, and that it was up to us to manage everyone else's purity.
It's the start of a new series — Lies I Believed — and we're beginning by gently unpacking the messages that formed us, and opening the door to healing and renewal.
Inside this conversation:
- Why modesty became more about fear than freedom
- The roots of shame many of us inherited from purity culture
- How these beliefs still show up in our bodies, marriages, and parenting
- What it means to reclaim a biblical vision of beauty, dignity, and pleasure
This episode isn't about swinging the pendulum or pushing a new dress code — it's about rethinking how we see our bodies through God's eyes, and creating space to disciple our daughters differently.
Resources and Invitation to Go Deeper:
Growth Courses
101 Strong Foundations for Married Sex, here
201 Pleasure and Orgasm: Passion and Practicals, here
Before (And After) I Do, here
Get Connected Inside the Circle Group Mentorship
Keep learning and get direct access to Francie! Join the Circle group mentorship. Inside the Circle, we talk practicals and get support to grow. Learn more here: The Circle
Donate to keep the message moving:
Your one time donation will allow us to continue to produce and distribute teaching and resources. Thank you for partnering with us! Donate here.
Connect with Francie:
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Female by Design podcast, an honest space for female flourishing. |
| 0:07.8 | I'm Francie Winslow. |
| 0:09.9 | Together we'll explore sexuality and spirituality by God's design, healing our relationship |
| 0:16.9 | with pleasure, our bodies, and our identity as beloved image bearers. |
| 0:23.1 | So let's take a deep breath and step into God's invitation to live fully alive as women, |
| 0:30.9 | mind, body, and spirit. I'm so glad you're here. |
| 0:36.6 | Hey guys, welcome back. |
| 0:37.9 | Today I want to begin a quick series, just a few weeks of the lies that I believed that kept me from embracing a theology of pleasure and understanding of God's heart for pleasure and how I have overcome those lies. |
| 0:51.3 | These lies are going to be very familiar to you, especially if you've |
| 0:54.6 | grown up in the church. And they're not going to be like rocket science, but I'm hoping there'll be |
| 0:59.4 | a bit of a pause for you to explore your story and how potentially these lies whizzled their way |
| 1:07.4 | into your journey of faith and took root in order to potentially block you |
| 1:13.3 | from walking in more freedom because at least that was my journey. So I'm going to share my |
| 1:17.9 | journey and you are welcome to listen in and discern if this is anything you want to further |
| 1:23.0 | explore or pray into for yourself and or with your friends because it's a conversation that the |
| 1:30.0 | more we have, the more we're understanding where we came from, how it's formed us and how it's |
| 1:35.6 | informing our reality and how we can also disciple our daughters into a different reality |
| 1:41.2 | so that they are not inheriting the same chains that we had and are |
| 1:46.6 | hopefully walking out of. So let's pray. God, thank you for our beautiful bodies. I just want to say |
| 1:55.3 | that. Thank you for our beautiful, good, lovely, honorable, marvelous bodies. Thank you that you made them. You created |
| 2:08.2 | them. You designed them. And our bodies are fearfully and wonderfully made. I pray that you |
| 2:16.4 | would bring healing today for any place that we have not believed |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Francie Winslow, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of Francie Winslow and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.