223: Santa's Extra Stocking Fillers

Regular Features

Comedy

4.9 • 546 Ratings

🗓️ 29 December 2016

⏱️ 23 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Santa's royally cocked up this year and forgot to deliver these three extra special feature presents straight to your audio stockings.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Poh-hoff!
0:02.0	Oh!
0:12.0	Oh! Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho! Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho ho.
0:32.1	Oh.
0:32.4	Oh. Ho, ho, Merry Christmas, from...
0:47.3	Santa Claus,, Santa Claus.
1:02.2	I cocked up a little bit because on Christmas Eve,
1:09.3	is it Christmas Eve, I forgot to deliver you some presents.
1:20.6	So via the magic of the regular features podcast, I've got some extra presents for you. But I forgot to deliver on Christmas Eve, as I said. Um, so first of all, got a present from, what's this, what's this say?
1:33.3	Oh yes, this is from someone calling themselves Joe Scrabble.
1:39.3	So this is what he got you as a present.
1:50.0	Christmas is coming. The geese are getting fat.
1:52.0	Please do put a penny in the old man's hat.
1:56.0	If you haven't got a penny, a heapenie will do.
2:00.0	If you haven't got a heapenny, then God bless you.
2:04.8	If God will not bless you, perhaps you've turned to sin. Perhaps it does not matter if you put a penny in.
2:13.3	That old man's bones are brittle. His hat is doffed, he's cold.
2:18.3	He'd put up scant resistance if you and your boys rolled.
2:22.3	You put on leather jackets, and first you break his arm.
2:26.3	You punch his hat inside and out. He knows that you mean harm.
2:30.3	All snapped and now are wailing, he asks of you,
2:34.5	But why? You say, Merry Christmas, Daddy-O, and pluck out his right eye.
	...

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