#22: 5 Reasons Why Anxiously Attached People Struggle with Break-ups

On Attachment

Stephanie Rigg

Self-improvement, Society & Culture, Education, Relationships

5 • 1K Ratings

🗓️ 24 August 2022

⏱️ 19 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

If you're someone with an anxious attachment style, there's a good chance you've really struggled to cope with relationship break-ups at some point in your life. And while break-ups are hard across the board, anxiously attached people tend to have an especially hard time wading through this emotional experience. In this episode, I'm sharing 5 reasons why break-ups are so challenging for anxiously attached people. We cover things like the abandonment wound, the saviour complex, fear of ...

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to On Attachment, a place to learn about how attachment shapes the way we experience dating, love and relationships.
0:12.2	I'm your host, relationship coach and attachment expert, Stephanie Rigg, and I'm really glad you're here.
0:28.2	Hey everybody, welcome back to another episode of On Attachment.
0:35.0	In today's episode, I'm going to be unpacking five reasons why anxiously attached people struggle so much with breakups.
0:41.0	So talking about things like the anxiously attached people struggle so much with breakups. So talking about things like the anxiously attached person's high needs for connection, the abandonment wound and fear of rejection and how
0:46.7	that can be really triggered in the context of a breakup, the savior complex, which is so common
0:52.3	among anxiously attached people, their struggles with
0:55.1	uncertainty and how that can really be stirred up during a breakup. And also difficulties around
1:01.5	self abandonment and really losing your sense of self in relationship and how that can lead to
1:07.1	an experience of emptiness and a sense of being really lost and rudderless once a
1:13.1	relationship ends. So going to be diving into all of those topics, it's going to be a really
1:18.2	great episode. And I'm sure if you're anxiously attached and listening to this, you're already
1:22.5	nodding your head knowing that breakups are indeed very, very challenging. So if that's you, rest assured you are not
1:30.2	alone. And hopefully by listening to today's episode, you'll have a greater understanding as to why that
1:37.9	is. Hopefully that will counter some of those stories you might be telling yourself around,
1:42.6	you know, there's something wrong with me or why am I like this? Why is it so hard? You're not broken and you're not alone. There are
1:50.6	perfectly reasonable explanations for why you feel the way you do in the wake of a breakup.
1:55.7	So that's what we're going to be talking about today. Before I dive into that, just a quick reminder
2:00.7	that my newest course,
2:02.0	Higher Love, is opening for enrollment in five days. So very, very soon, the countdown is on.
2:10.4	I'm really excited about this course, as you can probably hear in my voice. It's all about
2:15.2	healing from a breakup and really up-leveling personally so that you can
	...

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