202: Sam Attacked On Stage (AUDIO INSIDE) + Epstein Reporter Hit By Energy Weapon? + Cuba Invasion

Broken Simulation with Sam Tripoli and Johnny Woodard

Sam Tripoli & Johnny Woodard

News Commentary, Comedy, Stand-up, News, Politics

4.8 • 2.5K Ratings

🗓️ 1 June 2026

⏱️ 175 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Sam Tripoli has been accosted on stage again. We get into that, plus a reporter who investigated Epstein is fleeing the country after allegedly being targeted by directed-energy weapons, President Trump readies for a Cuba invasion, Tony Hinchcliffe responds to Chelsea Handler, Alex Stein helped expose the Washington Nationals, and Hasan Piker is in trouble.

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Social media: Twitter: @samtripoli, @johnnywoodard Instagram: @samtripoli, @johnnyawoodard

Broken Simulation Hosts: Sam Tripoli, Johnny Woodard

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Warning.
0:05.2	Broken simulation.
0:06.5	Broken simulation.
0:08.4	With Sam Tripoli.
0:11.9	Welcome to Johnny Woodard presents broken simulation song Johnny Woodard.
0:17.4	We are in it as fast as we can be.
0:20.8	Okay. I am here. Against all odds. I made it, guys.
0:27.5	I have this new rule I just instituted today. I'm going to leave the charger to my computer
0:33.5	in my bag for now on because I always leave it at home. So I went around, I went to Apple, Target, and then Best Buy to try to find his cord.
0:43.8	We don't carry that anymore.
0:45.5	And then I'm at Apple and I'm looking and literally the computers that they're trying to sell are using the cord.
1:11.1	These kids suck. Yeah, i'm in dude that's uh i heard i i heard that's maybe not even the uh best reason that you were late uh i heard that people are just trying to take you out man while you're on stage. Johnny, is this our hot topic?
1:13.8	This is absolutely our hot topic.
1:21.1	Yeah, I've been doing some stand-up, and I have three gigs this week.
1:22.7	Thursday night, I was in Coast Mesa.
1:39.2	Tonight, I, tomorrow, last night I was in at the La Jolla Comedy Store store and then tomorrow and I'm at the La Jolla co or tonight I'm at the whole loyhoia comedy store. So Thursday la ha ha ha someone says I look like I just got done punching Dana.
2:02.0	Um, but dude I was out. I so I had some time. I went and got breakfast. I'm just anywhere I can find Eggs Benedict because nobody makes it anymore. I'm going to bang out some Eggs Benedict. I love it. And I went there. My waitress is so hot. Really? You ever just had a chick that you see just your primal monkey comes out? Yeah, it's every chick I see.
2:06.3	You're like, that was this chick.
2:09.2	Streamyard did not like that sound you made it, like muted it.
2:10.2	It brought it way down.
2:13.5	Oh, my God, Streamyard is racist.
2:14.5	Censoring us.
	...

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