181. Ask a Coach: The It’s-Not-Working Mentality
Overcome Pornography for Good
Sara Brewer
5 • 679 Ratings
🗓️ 1 July 2024
⏱️ 7 minutes
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Summary
Coach Kat is on the show this week to address the it’s-not-working mentality, where you feel stuck and like nothing has changed. Maybe it feels like you’ve been doing the work for months, only to keep viewing porn. Perhaps this plateau is tempting you to give up, but the truth is the breakthrough you’re looking for is right around the corner.
Listen in this week as Coach Kat shows you how the it’s-not-working mentality might be showing up for you, and why you shouldn’t give up at this point. Hear why the work you’re currently doing isn’t going to waste, even if it feels like it, and how we know that the magic of change is inevitable if you don’t give up on yourself.
Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.centerforovercomingpornography.com/blog/ask-a-coach-the-its-not-working-mentality
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Overcome Pornography for Good podcast where we take a research-based, |
| 0:09.5 | trauma-informed and results-focused approach to quitting porn. |
| 0:14.5 | This approach has been revolutionary and changed thousands and thousands of lives. |
| 0:20.0 | I'm your host, Sarah Brewer. |
| 0:22.2 | Hey everyone. This is Kat from Overcome Pornography for Good. Today's Ask a Coach question is in |
| 0:27.8 | regards to this give up mentality or the it's not working mentality. Maybe you've heard |
| 0:34.4 | others say this or maybe you've said this yourself. It might sound something like |
| 0:38.2 | this isn't working for me. I've just been in the program for three months and I don't feel like |
| 0:43.7 | anything has changed. I just keep viewing. It doesn't matter what I do. The pattern never changes. |
| 0:50.1 | It might sound like I'm stuck. It might sound like I'm not making any movement on this or I'm in the same places when I started. |
| 0:57.8 | I don't know if you've heard of anybody say this or if you've said this yourself, but it could be maybe slightly different than this or some other flavor of this. |
| 1:05.6 | But that's what it kind of sounds like when we do this give up mentality. When we do this, it's not working mentality. |
| 1:12.9 | And so I want you to imagine with me for just a second, an ice cube sitting on the table in front of you. |
| 1:18.4 | So the room that you're in is very cold, so cold that you can see your breath as you blow the air out of your mouth. |
| 1:25.3 | So it's currently, let's say, 25 degrees. |
| 1:28.5 | And almost imperceptibly, the room starts to warm. |
| 1:32.5 | So now it's 26 degrees, 27, 28 degrees. |
| 1:37.0 | The temperature is rising slowly, |
| 1:39.3 | but the ice cube in front of you that you're looking at |
| 1:41.7 | on the table, it's still the same. |
| 1:43.7 | It hasn't changed. |
| 1:44.5 | So we keep turning up the degrees. 29, 30, 31. Nothing has happened. Still nothing changes. |
... |
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