180. Ask a Coach: How to Become Shame-Resilient

Overcome Pornography for Good

Sara Brewer

Christianity, Sexuality, Religion & Spirituality, Health & Fitness

5 • 679 Ratings

🗓️ 24 June 2024

⏱️ 10 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

This week’s Ask a Coach question is one many of you can probably relate to: “Does the shame I feel after slipping up and viewing porn ever really go away?”

While we can learn to move through shame in different and more useful ways, I don’t know that it’s possible to completely get rid of it. The good news is that while shame will continue to show up for us, what we can do is start developing shame-resilience. Coach Jessica Farmer is here this week to shed light on what it means to become shame-resilient and how to start practicing this skill.

Get full show notes and more information here: https://www.centerforovercomingpornography.com/blog/ask-a-coach-become-shame-resilient

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to the Overcome Pornography for Good podcast where we take a research-based,
0:09.5	trauma-informed, and results-focused approach to quitting porn. This approach has been revolutionary
0:16.6	and changed thousands and thousands of lives. I'm your host, Sarah Brewer.
0:22.5	Hello, everyone.
0:24.4	I am Jessica Farmer.
0:26.1	I'm a coach in overcoming pornography for good.
0:28.9	And I am here for our Ask a Coach question of the week.
0:34.2	For those of you that aren't aware,
0:36.3	Ask a Coach is a feature that we have in the
0:39.9	program where anytime you have a question or a worksheet or learn and move on that you've done
0:47.2	in the program, you can send it in email, Ask a Coach, and one of the coaches in the program
0:53.8	will answer your question. It's available 24-7.
0:57.3	We always get back to you in a timely manner and yeah, I'm excited to share this question with you
1:04.3	today that comes up a lot. It comes up pretty often. So the question is that I got in Ask a Coach a couple weeks ago, actually, is the question was,
1:17.4	does the shame I feel after slipping up, meaning after viewing porn ever really go away?
1:23.9	And this question has stuck with me because, oh, it just, it feels so heavy, right?
1:32.2	Like, does the shame ever really go away? And the answer to that is yes, it does. It can. It can go
1:43.0	away. And it's also kind of a complicated question because we, you know, shame, experiencing the emotion of shame is a universally human experience. We all experience shame at some point in time. And in fact, people who
2:04.0	don't experience shame, it's usually because they have some sort of disorder or some,
2:10.8	there's chemicals and their brain aren't working the way that they should. And so shame is,
2:17.1	it's something that we all experience.
2:20.8	And the place where we try to get people to in the program is, is not, we don't want to
	...

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