#178 Why Our Boys Are Struggling, Reframing Toxic Masculinity & Creating a New Script for Manhood with Richard Reeves
The Gabby Reece Show
Dear Media
4.8 • 954 Ratings
🗓️ 19 December 2022
⏱️ 64 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
My guest today is British author and Brookings Institute scholar Richard Reeves. Richard's latest book Of Boys and Men explores the reality of what is happening with our men and boys in the education system, workplace and home environment. I wanted to have this conversation with Richard because as a woman who has benefited so much from the women's equality movement and title nine I was curious if it was possible for our society To elevate all of its members simultaneously. I have three daughters, Richard has three sons and our observations of what they experience is almost polar opposite. In so many wonderful ways we have changed the script, the only thing left to do is to figure out how to rewrite the new one for men and boys. I found his book a compelling argument for trying to figure out how exactly we all can do that. Enjoy
Timestamps:- Writing Of Boys and Men [00:08:40]
- It’s Not Just About Men-Women [00:11:54]
- The Need for Male Teachers [00:23:09]
- Immature (Not Toxic) Masculinity [00:29:42]
- Changes in the Labor Market [00:37:28]
- Men and their Mental Health [00:42:16]
- Youth Transitioning to Adulthood [00:45:50]
- Crime and Suicide [00:49:27]
- A Whole Chapter That Didn’t Make It to the Book [00:51:10]
- Redefining the Internal Reward System [00:55:52]
- It’s Always About Humanity [01:02:10]
Connect with Gabby @gabbyreece | Linktree
For the full show notes visit gabriellereece.com
The Gabby Reece Show talks to top experts with the goal of extracting the best information you will need to navigate the universe of health, fitness, relationships, parenting, and business. Gabby keeps it simple but gets to the heart of the conversation with the hopes of providing you with realistic takeaways.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Gabby Rees Show where everything is an experiment. |
| 0:09.0 | I was really struck by the fact that almost one in four boys, 23% at K-12 age, have been diagnosed with a developmental disability in the US. |
| 0:20.0 | And at that point, you have to stop and say, do we really think that one in four of our boys are developmentally disabled or do we think there's something in the system? |
| 0:30.0 | It could it possibly be that the system's failing them rather than that they're failing in the system? |
| 0:38.4 | It looks like with the many fewer studies that of course have been done on the other side that it's true for |
| 0:43.6 | boys in subjects like English to be taught by a male teacher so there is some |
| 0:49.0 | evidence that having a male teacher improves the performance of boys in English and doesn't in any way affect |
| 0:55.3 | that of girls because again a bit against the grain, a bit against some of the biology etc. |
| 0:59.5 | And just speaking perfectly anecdotally, there is no doubt in my mind that I would not have been able to fall in love with the metaphysical poetry of John Dunn. |
| 1:09.0 | If my teacher hadn't been Mr. Wyatt, who was a grizzled Korean War veteran, who would have working-class 16-year-old |
| 1:17.7 | boys in tears reading metaphysical poetry from 400 years ago. That's a tough thing to do and I've no doubt in my mind that my love of words and of writing was hugely affected by the fact that a man was teaching me to do it. It's not to say it couldn't have been a woman. |
| 1:33.4 | And I actually had this quote, I think it's in the book, from J.F. Roxborough who was the |
| 1:40.1 | headmaster of Stowe School in England. |
| 1:43.0 | This is 100 years old, this quote. |
| 1:45.2 | He said, I'm trying to turn out men who will be acceptable at a dance and |
| 1:50.9 | invaluable in a shipwreck. And someone asked. and |
| 1:54.0 | someone asked me the other day, could you update that? |
| 1:57.0 | I said, actually, I thought, |
| 1:59.0 | no, actually, that's everybody knows what that phrase means. at dance means I've learned how to conduct myself well in society I know how to treat women |
| 2:07.4 | I know how to behave I know what to say what not to say I know how to take no for an answer graciously I know how to to dance but also if the ship |
| 2:15.7 | start sinking what the equivalent is I know what to do then too and so I still think that |
| 2:21.6 | captures a version of masculinity, albeit 100 years old, that is very important, but it's mature masculinity that were after, not non-toxic, because then you're defining masculinity against toxicity rather than a positive |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Dear Media, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of Dear Media and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.