158. Real Parenting: How We Parent Our Big Reactors

HERself

Abby and Amy

Grow, Health & Fitness, Education, Mental Health, Parenting, Kids & Family, Opportunity, Honest, Real, Vulnerable, Purpose, Best Self, Self-improvement, Future, Comparison

4.8 • 1.7K Ratings

🗓️ 5 December 2022

⏱️ 35 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

This week we are trying something new. We’ve decided to implement the things that we learned from our interview with Claire Lerner last week. We both have children who we consider to be big reactors. So we took our insights from our conversation with Claire and put them into action in our own homes!

One of Amy’s biggest takeaways was that each of her children might need individualized things. Her big reactor needs to be parented differently than his brothers. Continual praise and more time are a coping mechanism that seem to help.

Abby realized that when these types of kids have these big reactions they aren’t trying to cause a challenge. They are just trying to react in a way that their own body needs. They’re more sensitive, more empathetic, and look at the world in their own unique way.

The thing that we want you to know is that we don’t get it perfect every time. We are learning right alongside you. We are both, everyday, normal moms who aren’t experts. We struggle through this parenting thing as well. And it does get better. Both of our big reactors are around age five now and it has taken us a little longer to learn what parenting techniques work. We are making progress and hope this episode helps you do the same.

If you missed last week’s episode with Claire Lerner, be sure to listen here:
157. Real Parenting: What to Do When the Script Doesn't Work with Claire Lerner

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Transcript

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0:00.0	Another part that I really appreciated was when Claire was talking about how you cannot
0:04.5	control your child and if you listen to that part she was referring to things like when
0:09.2	we say stop hitting or don't throw that toy you cannot draw on the wall and that is
0:15.6	honestly 100% my first reaction when I see someone hitting my first reaction is to say
0:20.1	stop hitting and instead using language of okay you see what the situation is you become
0:25.8	aware and then you act as their helper I'm Amy and I'm Abby and as women we are constantly
0:37.5	comparing ourselves to others but your life isn't supposed to look like hers being your
0:43.5	best self means standing firm in your decisions and always being willing to grow with a purpose
0:49.0	we get vulnerable and real with an honest look into the challenges and triumphs we all
0:54.1	face every woman listening it's an opportunity to choose what life looks like for herself
1:00.0	okay so we're doing something a little bit different this week if you listen to last
1:09.7	weeks episode with Claire learner you know that we just went into so much detail on kiddos
1:14.4	who are big reactors so think about these kiddos as the ones where the deep breaths just
1:19.4	simply don't work it's harder to you know calm them down in the really tough situations
1:24.4	the things that the scripts say and that the discipline experts say they just don't work
1:29.4	as well and maybe you have other kiddos that you know those things do work but then you
1:33.3	have one child that things are just a little bit harder or as we're learning they just
1:38.8	need to be treated in a different way they just need to be disciplined and comforted
1:42.7	in a slightly different way so today we're Amy and I are going to jump on the mics and
1:47.0	talk through just really what we learned from Claire how we're implementing it into our
1:50.4	life and just some of the backup stories it was an awesome interview it went it went almost
1:54.8	the full hour but knowing also that there's a lot more behind the scenes that Amy and I
	...

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