157. Real Parenting: What to Do When the Script Doesn't Work with Claire Lerner
HERself
Abby and Amy
4.8 • 1.7K Ratings
🗓️ 28 November 2022
⏱️ 56 minutes
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Summary
We both have experience raising children who seem to not respond to gentle parenting. It has been frustrating for the both of us at times because it has made us feel isolated and exhausted. We are so excited to have Claire Lerner on today to share her expertise in this area.
Claire shares what to do if your child is wired differently during moments of aggression towards others. She explains that our children are not trying to be manipulative in any way, just that they need boundaries to help themselves regulate.
Have you ever wondered if timeouts are truly a thing of the past? Claire explains her concept of a safe space break and how this alone time can help kids get back to a place of calm.
With it being the middle of the holiday season, we know that these large family gatherings can be major triggers for our kiddos who tend to be big reactors. Claire helps us navigate the conversations we can have with not only our friends and family members, but with our children's teachers as well.
And next week, we will both share our learnings from implementing Claire's strategies into our own households. So be sure to tune in to hear how these teachings are helping us with our own personal situations at home.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Today, on the podcast, we have Claire Learner, who is a child development specialist with |
| 0:06.2 | over 30 years of experience working with children and families. |
| 0:11.9 | Claire, I heard her on another podcast and I knew that we had to have her on because she |
| 0:17.9 | just wholeheartedly understands that there is some nuance in parenting. |
| 0:24.4 | So right now when we have experts on or when we go on Instagram, we get kind of like |
| 0:30.3 | the same coaching and the same theories and the same scripts. |
| 0:35.7 | And what Abby and I have realized is that for one of our kids, those don't work. |
| 0:42.7 | And so we need people that are going to talk about what what happens when that gentle |
| 0:48.1 | parenting advice doesn't work. |
| 0:50.6 | What happens when you have a kiddo that is more sensitive is more reactionary, a kid |
| 0:56.3 | that sees red sometimes and you know you can't deescalate he or she like other kids. |
| 1:03.1 | So that was what we talked about today. |
| 1:05.3 | I think whether you have one of these kiddos or not, there's so many tangible things inside |
| 1:10.2 | of this episode. |
| 1:11.5 | And what I really loved about it is that she gave solutions without getting the same solutions |
| 1:17.6 | that everyone else gives and she also takes the comparison out of it comparison from |
| 1:22.2 | yourself with other parents comparison between children and to really treat that child exactly |
| 1:28.4 | how that child needs to be treated in that situation. |
| 1:31.2 | And just giving permission to explore the other options that we may have not heard of. |
| 1:35.8 | So overall I cannot wait to try some of these solutions in our own house and we can't |
| 1:40.0 | wait to see what you're gathering from this episode as well. |
| 1:47.3 | I'm Amy and I'm Abby and as women we are constantly comparing ourselves to others. |
... |
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