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So how did you, how did things go? Like you get back, you've hit rock bottom. Where do you go from there?

Just try to go back in a routine, just keep pushing forward.

Which is hard.

You didn't finish school. So what?

I tried, you know, it was, it was just very hard for me. Judge me all you want for not finishing high school. I don't care.

Doesn't define me because I was, you know, I have, I have ADD which, you know, takes the toll, you know, whatever, but a lot of people, ADD graduated.

So it's not the problem, but with my anxiety and depression, it had an effect on how I felt and how I paid attention and like I was just very sad.

Like I just would go to class and not learn anything. You know, I wouldn't do assignments. I would just want to lay in bed all day.

And, and then I missed out on a lot of school because I was like in and out of hospitals. I was struggling with medications.

It had a really bad side effect. I had to quit dance because of it. My eyes were having seizures. A lot of things that kept me from not being able to perform in high school.

Like, you know, like do my assignments, pay attention. So they started me on online classes and I started out really good. But I just ended up getting lazy, not caring enough and.

Yeah, just didn't finish. I tried even after, you know, but like, and I know I can, I know I can now isn't a dough. I do plan on at some point, you know, getting my GED.

But that hasn't been a priority of mine in my life right now. My priorities have been to survive, get through things.

I learned how to love myself. I finishing high school is not in the picture right now. Right. Of course.

But, but kind of is I'm trying to think about the story and how it develops. So you, so you have these intense periods of suicidality.

You're struggling with anxiety and depression. You have all these medications.

And the idea and you've tried to repent. And so you get to this point, you're 17, 18, 19 and you're trying to get back on the Mormon path.

You're trying to become a good girl. You're trying to get worthy. You're trying to please your parents.

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