Welcome to Betrayal Trauma Recovery. This is Anne. If you're new to the podcast and you've never listened to it before, please go to last week's episode and listen to it first.

Last week, we ended with Kate stating her views that 12-step was beneficial not necessarily

because of the steps themselves but because of the sisterhood that she felt there.

So we're going to start with her comment that you heard last week and go from there.

I feel like 12 steps might even make someone go backward.

Take out all the connection that you found within 12 steps, all the wonderful friends you were able to find the feeling

of you're not alone take that away with the 12 steps that's beneficial without any

best step what makes it good if it is good for

addiction here in my area.

I do know if you know but I teach 12-step.

I teach it for addiction here in my area.

So we do a combined, we do the spouse and addict together.

Is that there are so many times why I have to say,

I know this is what this says, but in real life,

if you want a happy marriage,

if you want to stay with your wife,

if you want to help her heal you're not going to follow what that says because a lot of 12-step is about protecting the addict. It's not about the spouse. It's about keeping that addict safe.

And we're not accountable to our wife.

Not only does it keep the spouse stuck,

it keeps the addict stuck to

and it enables his abusive behavior.

Absolutely, and there's another element to it.

...