You Had Everything and Still Cried in the Closet (Here's Why) | S2S 539

The Secret To Success with CJ, Karl, Jemal & Eric Thomas

S2S podcast

Education, Business, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness, Entrepreneurship

4.9 • 6.6K Ratings

🗓️ 30 April 2026

⏱️ 52 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Most people spend their whole lives chasing a version of success that looks right on paper and still leaves them empty. That is the conversation at the center of Episode 539, and it is one of the most honest hours this table has produced. Candis Quinney is back and she brings the moment that started everything. She was in her closet, stressed, overwhelmed, burnt out, with everything she had worked hard for, and still broke down. The house was there. The marriage was there. The kids were there. The pool was there. And none of it was enough. That moment did not break her. It built a movement. Candis is done watching women settle for a version of life that looks good from the outside and feels hollow on the inside, and she is calling everyone to a higher standard. ET picks up where Episode 538 left off, going deeper into what it actually felt like to release the need for control and what changed in his life and his marriage when he finally did. He also brings one of the most tender moments in recent S2S history, talking about going back to heal his mother and realizing she went through everything he blamed her for carrying. Karl's Kalm Down segment delivers one of the most practical frameworks this show has produced. Access and alignment are not the same thing. Just because something good comes to you does not mean it is yours. Make your decisions on alignment, not access. With Jemal away, CJ steps in with a sanctified session and does not hold back. God wants more for you than you want for yourself. Everything you do not have is because you are still operating below the level God designed for you. Stop shrinking. The episode also includes the announcement of ET and CJ's debut book "We Is Greater Than Me," now available for preorder on Amazon, and ET pulls out his GED on camera for the first time, earned February 9th, 1989, out of Lansing, Michigan. The certificate that started everything. If you are a woman who has ever smiled through something that was breaking you, Candis is building something for you. If you have ever felt like your life looks right but something is still off, this table sees you. In this Episode: Chapters 00:00:00 Opening: Access Is Not the Same as Alignment 00:00:57 The Shift: Letting Go of Control and Trusting God's Plan 00:05:22 Breaking Generational Cycles: Understanding Your Parents' Pain 00:07:54 The Yoke Up Revelation: What It Really Means to Partner with Christ 00:12:33 Your Best Self Is for Hard Times, Not Good Times 00:10:27 Letting Go of Titles and Traditions That Kill Us 00:28:07 The Jada Story: When DD's Leadership Changed Everything 00:19:55 From the East Side to Bliss: Candace's Transformation Journey 00:21:47 Parenting Without Living Through Your Kids 00:33:12 Book Reveal: We Is Greater Than Me 00:43:17 Candace's Movement: From Crying in the Closet to Leading Women 00:48:32 Closing Word: Grow Up and Open Your Packages Connect with Candis: @justcandisquinney on Instagram APOC Ministry virtual church, Saturdays at 11:00 AM ET on YouTube Subscribe so you never miss an episode: https://www.youtube.com/@SecretToSuccess?sub_confirmation=1 Join the S2S Patreon for early access every week: https://www.patreon.com/s2spodcast Follow us on Instagram: @s2spodcast Listen on Apple Podcasts: Search "Secret to Success" on Apple Podcasts and Spotify Secret to Success is hosted by Eric Thomas, Karl Phillips, CJ Quinney, and Jemal King. About the Secret to Success Podcast The Secret to Success podcast is hosted by Eric Thomas (ET, The Hip Hop Preacher), Karl Phillips, CJ Quinney, and Jemal King. For over two decades ET has been one of the most recognizable voices in personal development, motivation, and leadership. The Secret to Success podcast goes beyond the highlight reel to show the real conversations happening behind the work, covering marriage, business, wealth building, faith, and what it actually takes to build a life worth living. New episodes every Thursday on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, and Spotify.

Transcript

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0:00.0	I had a situation where we were looking for somewhere to live.
0:05.0	And I had a family that was saying, hey, you can stay at our place, pay rent.
0:09.9	We take care of you.
0:10.8	Don't even worry about it.
0:11.5	And it's not going to be expensive.
0:12.7	But boom.
0:14.7	Beautiful.
0:15.3	Like I'm just saying they're looking out for me.
0:16.9	That's access.
0:18.0	Diti said to me, Carl, you need to buy a house because you would pay somebody else's rent and you and your family will not have anything. Now, please hear what I'm saying. Access was not bad. It was actually, it would have been a great thing for my family, but it wasn't full alignment for where God wanted my family to be. So I want people to hear that access. Yes, There's some stuff that might come to you and all that, but it's not the same
0:39.5	as alignment. So I want you to make your decisions
0:41.6	on alignment and not
0:43.3	access.
1:08.0	I'm going to The Secret of Success Podcast, bet.
1:21.3	The thing that shift from me, when I started realizing, this was God's plan.
1:25.4	When you saw the anger, the anger was control.
2:02.1	That was the root of it. Like, ain't nobody going to ever put me in a situation again where your decisions are going to make me feel a certain type of way. It ain't going down like that. I don't care who you are, where you come from. And this is why I try to explain to people like, oh, you know, it seemed like you were rebellious. No, I'm not, I promise you I'm not. I'm just not going to, y'all heard me preach a couple weeks about roots. Like, yo, if I can help it, I'm not, I don't care if it's aggressive or passive. Nobody is going to make me wear something I don't want to wear because you don't even know why you wearing it. I'm just being real, bro. I'm just like most of y'all doing stuff.
2:03.2	You don't even know why you're doing it. You're just doing it because you live in a white America and they have dictated certain things. Like you got to go to school. His kids going to school shouldn't even be in school. But they didn't make it where it's like college. Now we shifted and said, forget about college.
2:17.0	I'm like, bro, I'm not doing that.
2:18.4	I want to figure out for me, just like you get to figure out for you. made it where it's like college. Now we shifted and said, forget about college. I'm like, bro, I'm not doing that.
2:18.4	I want to figure out for me, just like you get to figure out for you how you talk on TV and how you run the world. I just want to do that for me. And God was like, no, no, no, do me a favor. Let that go. You don't need control because you don't even know where you're going. No, you need to let me have control
2:36.5	And I promise you, bro You don't need control because you don't even know where you going.
	...

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