Hi, my name is John Kim. I'm a therapist who went through his own rebirth many years ago

and I've been documenting my journey ever since sharing my life lessons and revelations.

I believe in casual or clinical with you instead of at you. I come unrehearsed on purpose

because self-health doesn't have to be so complicated.

Although in my book, Single on Purpose, I say that you have to find yourself first. I say that because I think that process has to get started.

So when you find someone that you want to invest in that

ball is already rolling you have already laid some kind of track right and I think that's really

important but the idea that you can't be with someone

until you find yourself is not true. That is a misconception. I think we all say it, you know, we all cheer lead the message that you can't be

with someone else until you find yourself first and then when you find yourself, then you

start to love someone else. And I'll tell you why it's not true because we actually find ourselves through other people.

We can start the process and I talk a lot about this in the book and what I did during my four years of being single post-divorce I started the process meaning meaning I, you know, I got involved in my own,

creating my own program, discovering who I am.

So that process has to get started first because when you date someone, a lot of that

it goes out the window, like it doesn't become a priority anymore, you know, and this is why when we're single we get very

busy building our shit and working on our bodies and you know going to therapy and reading books

and all that now if you are in a relationship usually it's slowly goes out the window

usually it fades and I get it you know we get busy we just want to be with

our partners we you know going out to doing things activities

and then this idea of working on ourselves it kind of goes by the wayside right and

so yes you do have to find yourself

first in the sense that you got to start the process of your own self-discovery you got to

...