Hello everybody. Starting off this press conference as the new chairwoman of the United States.

So essentially what has happened, everybody don't panic. Men have now been eliminated from

the US population. And you know what, you might be thinking, what do we do here? What are

we supposed to do? What I'm going to tell you is this is fantastic news. No more cis

gender men, no more male privilege whatsoever in this nation. Now there's a few first orders

of business that we're going to get into. Business order number one is going to be that there

will no longer be any pink tax on any female products. Secondly, toilet seats will always

be left down in the United States of America. And we are now going to discontinue football

and golf. All these horrible things that cis gendered men have contributed to our society

are now going to be gone. We will no longer have to worry about this as females.

Chairwoman, chairwoman, chairwoman, I got here. Oh, I got here as fast as I could. I'm

from the United Federation of Mexican women. And we were trying to get to this press conference,

but on the way our car had a flat tire. Well, get a woman to fix a tire. Do any women

here know how to fix a tire? None of them. Is there no woman that knows how to fix a tire?

Well, then our light went out in the in the meeting room. And so we had to change the

light bulb. Then get a woman to change the light bulb. Do any of you women know how to

change light bulb? No, none of you were screwed. Yeah, help me out. And seen that is our opening.

It was a little chaotic. I'm going to be honest because you spread water right as our

opening started. I spilled water all over our table. And there's lots of very precious

equipment. And Scott and Tyler just sit there and just watch. All over the place. Scott

and Tyler who have no jobs that involve being on camera. Scott jumped into action to be

fair. Scott, after I pointed out the rag in the corner at the moment of truth, you will

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