Why Some People Change and Others Don't [353]
Flying Free
Natalie Hoffman
5 • 1K Ratings
🗓️ 11 November 2025
⏱️ 30 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
It’s time to talk about the two kinds of people in this world: the seekers and the stuck.
In this episode, I dive deep into the real reasons why some lives transform after abuse while others continue to feel stuck.
We’re unpacking:
- Why healing is not about labeling your abuser a narcissist and calling it a day
- How to know when you’re ready to move from survivor to thriver.
- What your philosophy of life has to do with your emotional garden.
- Why reading one more Instagram post about toxic people isn’t going to transform your life.
- And how your anger might just be the spark that gets you out of the cage.
Read the full show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here
Related Resources:
- Listen to my book, All the Scary Little Gods, for FREE!
- Liked this episode? Then check out these two other Flying Free episodes, “An Emotional Recovery Tool That Changes Everything” and “How Pretending and Fear Keep You Stuck in Abuse Cycles.”
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hi, this is Natalie Hoffman of Flying FreeNow.com, and you're listening to the Flying Free Podcast, |
| 0:08.9 | a support resource for women of faith looking for hope and healing from hidden emotional and spiritual abuse. |
| 0:18.6 | Welcome to episode 353 of the Flying Free Podcast. |
| 0:25.1 | Picture this. |
| 0:26.5 | A year from now, you're listening to this episode again. |
| 0:30.3 | Will you be the same person sitting in the same place, |
| 0:34.1 | scrolling through the same posts, |
| 0:36.3 | having the same conversations about the same problems, |
| 0:40.5 | or will you be someone who barely recognizes who you used to be? Because you have been transformed |
| 0:48.2 | by the courage to seek truth and then actually implement the hard work of real change. Today we're going to talk |
| 0:58.0 | about two different types of philosophies, okay? A philosophy of being a seeker and then a philosophy |
| 1:05.0 | that keeps us stuck. And more importantly, we're going to talk about how you get to choose |
| 1:09.5 | which one you become one year from now. |
| 1:14.2 | So here's what I've noticed. |
| 1:16.7 | It's not really about the circumstances that we are all facing. |
| 1:22.6 | It's not necessarily about the resources that we have, although some people do have more resources |
| 1:29.3 | than others, that's for sure. And it's not even about how difficult the situation is, although |
| 1:35.1 | again, some people have, you know, situations, circumstances are on a spectrum of difficulty, |
| 1:40.4 | right? But this is about something more fundamental. This is about our philosophy of life and |
| 1:47.0 | our willingness to examine it even when it might feel uncomfortable to do that. |
| 1:53.0 | So let's start with an important truth. We all are going to face similar types of challenges in our lives. But we don't, let me be clear, we don't all start |
| 2:04.6 | with the same advantages. Let's think about life like a garden, okay? We're all going to deal with |
... |
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