Why Positive Thinking, High Self-Esteem and Affirmations Are Overrated - and what to do instead: Dr Russ Harris
A New Way of Being
Simon Mundie
4.8 • 523 Ratings
🗓️ 19 July 2024
⏱️ 10 minutes
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Summary
Changing 'negative' thoughts to 'positive' thoughts takes up a lot of energy and doesn't always work. But if we can recognise that having 'negative' thoughts and feelings is an entirely normal part of the human experience, we can stop resisting the inevitable. And when we stop resisting - they frequently unwind on their own.
My guest is the world-renowned ACT expert Dr Russ Harris, author of The Happiness trap and the Confidence Gap.
**
My book Champion Thinking: How To Find Success Without Losing Yourself draws on some of my favourite interviews over the last six years. In it, I seek to challenge our ideas about 'success', and where peace, joy and fulfilment are truly to be found.
'This book captures the magic of being in flow . . . Highly recommend' RONNIE O'SULLIVAN
'Entertaining and enlightening' MATTHEW SYED
'This book will challenge your thinking on what success truly is and will give you tools to "succeed" in life in the truest sense of the world. This is definitely not just another book about sport and those who happen to be good at it' -- GOLDIE SAYERS
'The intention behind this book is beautiful, and I highly recommend it' RUPERT SPIRA
'The best guide we have to what it means to be human' AMOL RAJAN
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hey guys, welcome back. Simon here. In this bite-sized episode, we are hearing from Dr. Russ Harris, a guy |
| 0:06.7 | who I am very fond of and who I've spoken to a few times and whose books, the happiness |
| 0:13.6 | trap and the confidence gap are highly recommended. It's based on acceptance and commitment therapy |
| 0:19.2 | his work and I'm a big fan of act. |
| 0:21.2 | It's had a big impact on my life. It got me out of insomnia in my 20s and really open my eyes |
| 0:25.7 | to a completely different way of experiencing myself, my thoughts, but also reality at large. |
| 0:31.7 | And it's had this momentum ever since. So I'm very, very grateful. And it is a gateway drug to an even deeper insights. But in this episode, |
| 0:42.1 | what I'm talking about or what we're talking about is where act differs from a lot of positive |
| 0:48.7 | psychology, a lot of positive psychology talks about things that seem to make a lot of sense. |
| 0:52.9 | And maybe they do work for people |
| 0:54.5 | up to a certain point. Positive thinking, the importance of high self-esteem, affirmations and the like. |
| 1:02.1 | And, you know, positive thinking sounds great and it can definitely be of use sometimes, but not all the time. And I saw this at Wimbledon very |
| 1:13.9 | clearly last year, enjoubert, big advocate of positive thinking, went out for the Wimbledon |
| 1:18.6 | final and had a panic attack beforehand because inevitably when you're going out into an |
| 1:23.9 | environment like that, something you really want, something you probably crave |
| 1:28.0 | since you're a young girl, and also, you know, you're going to be watched by millions of people |
| 1:32.7 | around the earth. Of course, you're going to feel difficult thoughts and feelings. And so battling |
| 1:38.0 | and changing them from negative to positive, going to take up a hell of a lot of energy. |
| 1:42.0 | However, the whole point of act is about relating to our inner experience differently. If you know a thought is just a thought, if you know a feeling is a sensation in the body that will pass and it's our resistance to them that causes the main problems, then we can start to do what we need to do irrespective of how we feel. We work in accordance with our values. What's important to us? What do we want to do? |
| 2:01.4 | What do we need to do at this moment? And not being held back by our thoughts and feelings, which are |
| 2:06.5 | transitory. And it's our resistance to them that causes the big problem. So that's the essence of acts. |
| 2:11.1 | And in this bite-sized episode, Rusters talk specifically around affirmations, positive thinking, self-esteem, and why they are, frankly, overrated. |
... |
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