Why Modern Society Makes Us Feel More Lonely

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck Podcast

Mark Manson

Self-improvement, Education

4.8 • 3.8K Ratings

🗓️ 20 March 2024

⏱️ 39 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

I came across some mildly terrifying statistics on loneliness and wanted to figure out what was going on.

In this episode Drew and I break down three paradoxes we're calling “The Three Paradoxes of Modern Loneliness” and they are as follows:

We are more connected than ever, yet loneliness is at an all-time high
The more urbanized our lifestyles become, the lonelier we become
Despite being more social, young people are becoming lonelier than older people

Join us as we dig into the data and discuss why this all might be happening and what we can do about it. Check it out.

Transcript

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0:00.0	So I came across some stats Drew and these are mildly terrifying. I want to go through them really quick.
0:05.2	A 2023 Gallup survey found that over 50% of people say that they feel at least a little bit lonely in their lives.
0:12.0	27% of people said they feel very lonely in their lives.
0:15.0	Last year, one in three Americans say that they feel socially isolated from others.
0:20.0	Since the 90s, the number of people who say that they have zero friends has quadrupled in the US and
0:25.4	tripled in the UK and the marriage rate has fallen by over 60% in the last two generations.
0:30.6	It's at a record low and a stunning 57% of single people say that they have given up or have no interest in dating.
0:37.0	Yet this is happening in a time where the world is more connected than ever.
0:41.0	More of us live in closer proximity to each other than ever, and it is easier to keep in touch with the people that we care about more than ever.
0:49.4	In short, Drew, what the fuck is going on in the world right now?
0:53.0	I thought that's what you were going to tell me.
0:55.0	Oh, this is my job.
0:57.0	This is what I'm here for. That is your job.
0:58.0	I'm just, I'm here for the numbers, I guess.
1:01.0	I don't know. We're going to investigate three of these paradoxes today.
1:03.7	We're calling them the three paradoxes of modern loneliness and we're going to break these
1:07.1	down one by one. The first one is paradox number one. We are more connected than ever,
1:11.2	yet loneliness is at an all-time high.
1:13.9	I actually heard a term just recently by the journalist Derek Thompson.
1:16.9	He called it dopamine inequality.
1:19.5	As soon as he said that, it hit home really, really hard because I've been experiencing this in my own
1:24.1	social life. Social media it's just a bucket of dopamine in your face over and over again.
	...

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