Why Jimmy Fallon’s “Perfect” Christmas Is BS: Real Parents Wrap Gifts at 3AM Like Animals

Opie Radio

Tv & Film, Comedy, Music

3.6 • 4.8K Ratings

🗓️ 3 December 2025

⏱️ 69 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Opie and Ron the Waiter torch Jimmy Fallon’s fantasy-land Holiday Seasoning channel while confessing the real holiday chaos: midnight gift-wrapping marathons, kids figuring out Santa way too early, and Tooth Fairy inflation hitting twenty bucks a pop. From savage takes on pickleball Christmas movies to Trump pardoning narco-terrorists and the scary truth about wireless earbuds frying your brain—this irreverent, high-energy rant is the unfiltered holiday episode you didn’t know you needed. Grab your eggnog and hit play before you lose your mind this December. Kidding about grabbing the egg nog! Who does that unless you're Jimmy Fallon!

Transcript

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0:00.0	Oh, oh.
0:03.4	There we are.
0:05.5	Simply having a wonderful Christmas time.
0:10.6	Simply having a wonderful Christmas time.
0:14.3	Good morning.
0:14.6	Welcome to my lives during 500 feet above the streets of New York City.
0:17.6	Look who's on the screen with me.
0:19.0	Ronnie babes, Rhonda waiter. I mean, speaking
0:22.5	at Christmas, hello. Look at me. I'm like Father Christmas. Oh, Father Christmas.
0:30.2	That's all the kinks, I think. Father right i'm uh i'm in the christmas mood
0:40.6	because uh i'm obsessed with jimmy fallon's uh holiday seasoning channel on serious xm oh my god
0:46.4	this channel is everything it's christmas songs wait hold on opie everyone's on serious xm except you
0:53.8	yeah well thanks for remind me ron i don't know why i do it hold on Opie. Everyone's on serious XM except you. Yeah.
0:55.1	Well, thanks for reminding me, Ron.
0:57.4	I don't know why I do it to myself because every, for the people that go, you stink,
1:02.3	you suck.
1:03.3	How about you go listen to Sirius XM?
1:05.6	And then you can't possibly say that I stink and I suck with Ron the waiter.
1:11.7	It's impossible.
1:12.8	There are so many garbage shows on Sirius X-Exempt right now.
1:15.9	They're boring.
1:17.4	They're low energy.
	...

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