I hit a wall every day between like two and four I get so tired I'm sure it's a caffeine

crash I'm sure am I going to stop drinking coffee?

Absolutely not.

Absolutely not.

I'm going to continue to be all hyped up the first half of the day,

drink my liquid anxiety slash, cleanser and then I'm gonna crash the fuck out the second half of the day.

And it's like I even have a coffee in the afternoon to try and hype up again and it stops working.

Anyway, at least it's not crack.

There was a time in my life where I literally would buy

BLO W like to focus. I was like I need to focus I can't let me get this illegal

stimulant to like try and focus and like right it wasn't like a party thing for me.

That's concerning you guys.

But you know it's been it'll be 13 years with no alcohol or drugs for me in October so that's pretty cool

pretty pretty cool today Today I have no idea I have no clue my life is wild I actually feel that I'm in a good place though

overall I started therapy I did I've done three sessions and I swear to God I say I don't know why I didn't do it sooner but I tried here and there and like the therapists that were recommended were on a list, and then life got busy,

and I was like, no, I have a sponsor in a 12-step program,

that's enough, and even my sponsor was like,

after one of our sessions, she's like, you need therapy. And I was like, all right, and she's like you need therapy and I was like all right and she's like a

licensed family therapist my sponsor is and she's straight up was like you need therapy

like you're fucked up so I was like all right so I found

someone and he's been amazing and he's teaching me right now about functional boundaries and Lord knows I need to learn about

how to make, keep and implement functional boundaries in my relationships, not just romantic, family, friends, all of it, but especially, well,

...