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Zen Pop

Why Empathy Matters- Episode # 815

Zen Pop

Todd and Cathy Adams

Tv & Film, Arts, Society & Culture

4.9637 Ratings

🗓️ 13 May 2025

⏱️ 45 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Todd and Cathy share the upcoming changes to their podcast, Zen Parenting Radio, which will be renamed Zen POP Parenting starting June 1st!  Empathy drives connection, but some claim it’s dangerous because it disrupts the status quo they want to maintain. We explore why empathy is being framed as a flaw, and how history, research, and pop culture remind us that caring about others isn’t weakness—it’s what keeps us human. Plus, a deep dive into the greatest villains and protagonists in film and what they teach us about staying grounded in what we know to be true.

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For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.

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AI Summary

Summary
Podcast Shifts to Pop Culture Focus
Todd and Cathy announced a shift in their podcast, Zen Parenting Radio, to focus more on pop culture and its reflection of societal values, parenting, and self-awareness. They plan to explore how pop culture has shaped their beliefs and parenting styles, and how it can provide deeper insight into who they are and how they want to show up in the world. The new direction is set to start on June 1st, with the first two episodes already recorded.

New Pope’s Chicago Connection Discussed
The new Pope, Leo, hails from the south side of Chicago and is a White Sox fan, which has sparked excitement and a sense of connection among Chicagoans. Todd discusses how people are finding ways to relate to the Pope through personal anecdotes and shared experiences. The conversation touches on the Pope’s potential focus on ministry and caring for others, drawing comparisons to Pope Francis’s approach. Todd also mentions a women’s group meeting on Zoom with Kathy scheduled for the following day.

Empathy’s Importance in Business and Parenting
Todd discussed the importance of empathy and its demonization in various contexts, including religious doctrine and business. He emphasized the need for clarity on the concept of empathy and its benefits, using his college class as an example. Todd also introduced Team Zen, a platform for deep parenting discussions and workshops, and encouraged attendees to join. He concluded by highlighting the need for empathy in parenting and society, despite its potential misinterpretation.

Todd’s Movie Quote Guessing Game
Todd plays a movie quote guessing game, sharing various quotes and discussing the films they come from. He correctly identifies quotes from “Before Sunrise,” “Winnie the Pooh,” “The Fall of the Roman Empire,” and “Bee Movie.” Todd expresses his family’s fondness for “Bee Movie,” describing it as a “sick movie” they watched frequently when the children were ill. He concludes with a quote from “The Greatest,” featuring Muhammad Ali.

Empathy: Balancing Compassion and Moral Clarity
Todd discussed the concept of empathy, addressing concerns that it can be seen as negative. He clarified that empathy is not about feeling and taking on another person’s emotions, but rather understanding their feelings by relating to them through personal experiences. Todd emphasized the importance of maintaining stability and moral clarity while empathizing with others, and not being overwhelmed by their emotions. He also touched on the theological concerns surrounding empathy, stating that it should not compromise one’s moral judgment or lead to sinful behavior under the guise of compassion.

Empathy and Interconnectedness in Theology
Todd discussed the importance of spiritual practices in fostering empathy and connection among individuals. He questioned the notion of empathy being labeled a sin, suggesting that it might be a means to protect a doctrine rather than people. Todd emphasized the interconnectedness of theology and the need for understanding and empathy in relationships. He also shared his personal interests in psychology, cultural studies, and theology, highlighting the importance of education in fostering empathy and understanding.

Men as Heroes and Villains
Todd discussed the perception of men as heroes and the need to recognize the system that has been conditioned to prioritize women’s safety. He used the example of a lost child being more likely to find help from a mother with a stroller than a father without one. Todd also referenced a controversy about a man-bear hybrid and the prevalence of male villains in popular culture, using the example of the top 20 movie villains of all time. He concluded by highlighting the scarcity of female villains in this list, with only a few notable exceptions.

Villains in Horror Movies: Psychological Motivations
Todd discussed the concept of villains in horror movies, specifically Michael Myers and Jason. He argued that Michael Myers should have been portrayed as an energy or force that could be passed on, rather than being killed and resurrected repeatedly. Todd also compared the villains of various horror movies, including Friday the 13th, Halloween, and Lord of the Rings, and discussed the psychological motivations behind their actions.

Method Actor Supports Michelle Williams
Todd discusses various topics in the entertainment industry, including Jeremy Strong’s support for Michelle Williams after Heath Ledger’s death and a list of top movie protagonists. He mentions that Jeremy Strong, despite his reputation as a method actor, helped Williams and her daughter during a difficult time. Todd then shares a list of top movie protagonists, which includes mostly male characters from classic films, with Ellen Ripley from Alien being one of the few female characters mentioned. The conversation concludes with a discussion about other notable female protagonists who were not included in the list.

Empathy vs Sympathy in Connection Building
Todd discussed the importance of empathy in building connections and taking care of others. He differentiated empathy from sympathy, emphasizing that empathy involves feeling with someone, while sympathy is more external and can make people feel more alone. Todd also highlighted the potential dangers of discouraging empathy, as it can lead to policing behavior and silencing dissent. He concluded by emphasizing the role of empathy in fostering connection and its contrast with sympathy, which drives disconnection.

Parenting Through Connection and Change
Todd discussed the importance of connection and reconnection in parenting, using Richard Rohr’s concept of order, disorder, and reorder as a framework. He emphasized the need to adapt to changes in family dynamics and maintain empathy while supporting loved ones. Todd also highlighted the significance of maintaining a sense of self amidst these changes.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hey, everybody, big things ahead. Don't worry, we're not going anywhere. For the past 15 years,

0:04.7

Zen Parenting Radio has brought you thoughtful conversations about mindfulness, parenting,

0:09.0

compassion, and self-awareness, and a bit of pop culture, too. Well, we're ready to modernize.

0:14.8

We'll be exploring the same themes, but from a new direction. As Jen Exha's who grew up with pop culture

0:20.4

and are now raising kids in it,

0:22.1

we've always known that pop culture plays a big role in our relationships and family culture,

0:27.1

and it's been a touchstone, a conversation starter, and a way we've stayed connected and made sense of the world.

0:33.2

Starting June 1st, you'll hear us talk more about the shows and music we grew up with and what's new now and how it all reflects our societal values, our blind spots, our potential for growth, and the ways we connect with our children and each other.

0:47.4

We'll still be diving into mindfulness, parenting, compassion, and self-awareness, but pop culture will be our main entry point.

0:54.5

For example, you might be interested in how MTV shaped our beliefs in parenting,

0:58.0

why George Michael's father figure has somehow stayed relevant and even interesting to our kids

1:03.3

and how the E True Hollywood story on Robert Downey Jr. remind us what addiction looked like

1:08.7

long before he became our kid's hero as Ironman.

1:12.4

We're also making this shift because we believe, especially right now,

1:15.6

we all need more reminders of our connection, a bit of optimism and humor,

1:19.5

and a historical pop culture lens to help us remember that we're still in this together

1:23.3

and that we're going to be okay.

1:25.8

It's a small shift that means a lot to us. We know that pop culture

1:29.6

is a mirror, and when we look at it with curiosity and honesty, we find deeper insight into who we are,

1:35.1

what we care about, and how we want to show up in the world. So stay tuned. The title and topics will be

1:41.2

new and exciting, and the heart of the show will stay the same.

1:45.2

But we think you'll notice a renewed enthusiasm and joy.

...

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