Why Can’t I Remember Clearly in My Relationship?

Narcissist Apocalypse: Patterns of Abuse

Abuse Survivor Network

True Crime, Society & Culture, Education, Relationships, Self-improvement

4.7 • 791 Ratings

🗓️ 21 April 2026

⏱️ 27 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Brandon talks about why so many survivors struggle to remember clearly during an abusive relationship and after it ends. He breaks down how gaslighting, denial, smear campaigns, exhaustion, fear, and chronic stress can leave someone doubting their own mind. This episode is about fuzzy memories, missing pieces, self-doubt, and the shame survivors can carry when they cannot tell their story in a straight line. It’s also about understanding that this confusion is not proof that nothing happened. It can be a sign of what abuse did to your nervous system, your sense of safety, and your ability to trust yourself again.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Welcome to Narcissist Apocalypse, everyone. I am Brandon Chadwick and today we will be discussing
0:11.0	why you can't remember clearly in the relationship and outside of the relationship once it is over.
0:18.5	Fuzzy memories, no memories at all.
0:21.3	We'll be getting into all of that.
0:23.7	But if you want to be a guest on our Survivor Story episodes, please go to our website at
0:30.4	Narcissistapocalypse.com, click on our guest form button, fill out the form, and press the
0:36.5	submit button.
0:37.6	Also, we have a support group at our website at Narcissistapocalypse.com with Zoom meetings
0:42.6	every Wednesday night, Thursday afternoons, and Saturday nights, and we have forum boards
0:46.7	who to post on to get the validation you need from survivors just like you.
0:50.5	It is a wonderful group of people on there, and you can make a lot of friends, too.
0:53.8	So join our support group today.
0:56.8	And we have a newsletter at our website, and you can sign up at Narcissistapocalypse.com, and you get a free workbook for every new episode that comes out.
1:07.0	So that is at Narcissistapocalypse.com.
1:09.4	And today we are going to be discussing everything here
1:12.7	to do with your memory and memory loss in abuse. We're going to discuss this as like a full
1:18.4	3D picture. And we're going to name a bunch of clusters of things, understand how the brain
1:24.5	works a little bit here. And there are several things going on here at
1:29.7	once. And they're all just trying to produce the same result. So you stop trusting your mind. And
1:37.3	hopefully once you see all of these pieces, see how you're viewing things. Maybe there's shame around
1:43.7	memory not being there, having fuzzy
1:46.2	memories. There could be a lot of shame going on. We just kind of want to lower that a little bit.
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Abuse Survivor Network, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Abuse Survivor Network and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.