While the Wife's at Church
The Doug Stanhope Podcast
All Things Comedy
4.8 • 2.2K Ratings
🗓️ 10 August 2025
⏱️ 65 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Early Release Episodes over on Patreon and YouTube
Doug and Andy catch up during some time off from the road. Andy’s pitches his plan to recruit skilled young people willing to work for free, while Doug wrestles with guilt over his white privilege and not needing to watch the news.
Andy shares the kinks he’s aged out of, Doug reminisces about the one-legged girl who got away, and both confront the realities of aging – including Doug getting trapped in a posture-correcting brace and Andy accepting that he’s come to the tail-end of his handsome years.
**Support the show and get 20% off your first Lucy order with code STANHOPE at https://www.lucy.co/STANHOPE **
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hello? |
| 0:01.0 | Hello? |
| 0:02.0 | So I had to, God damn, yeah, I'm fucking plan B at the shit. |
| 0:07.0 | There we go. |
| 0:08.0 | Can you hear us now? |
| 0:09.0 | Can you hear us? |
| 0:10.0 | Yeah, yeah, I got my fucking computer is just a piece of shit. |
| 0:15.0 | It's just fucking, so anyway, yeah, so there was a lot of shit going on with the computer i got my |
| 0:22.8 | other thing out uh i couldn't figure out any of that other shit it'd take years for me to figure |
| 0:29.2 | out how to hook that thing up uh anyway uh so this is better yeah if you if you took some of that |
| 0:35.9 | money you'd been spending on fucking river dogs gear and Indiana Pacers hats and Norway refrigerator magnets, you could have bought a new computer. |
| 0:45.5 | I could. |
| 0:46.2 | I could take my gun that I don't know how to love to a computer store and say, look, look, man, I need a fucking computer right now. |
| 0:56.9 | But now my computer is, yeah, my computer always wants to update. |
| 1:00.7 | And I, and it's going to update whether I say, I mean, I don't have other appliances to just say, |
| 1:06.0 | I'm not going to make toast for you unless you do upgrade or update plug this shit in just make the |
| 1:12.6 | fucking toast your appliance I turn you on your fucking TV with a fucking |
| 1:18.6 | other purposes but I'm ready to yeah I need to see a few more checks |
| 1:27.0 | before I could just throw it open the deck. |
| 1:33.8 | Pulling it down to the street below and then fire shots at it. |
| 1:39.4 | But, yeah, now it's all over. |
| 1:41.6 | It's behind me. |
... |
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