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The Bert Show

When You Have A Huge Therapy Revelation...Do You Tell Your Friends?

The Bert Show

The Bert Show

News, Entertainment News, Comedy, Society & Culture

4.14.4K Ratings

🗓️ 9 October 2025

⏱️ 12 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

100925 - 0600 - BERT - THERAPY TALK

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

No one likes experiencing hairfall, so why not try the award-winning range Genesis by Kerasdars.

0:05.7

Their serum provides up to 84% less hairfall due to breakage. It's lightweight and non-greasy,

0:11.2

so doesn't weigh hair down. Ideal for post and pre-styling. Try Kerasastas fortifying anti-hairful

0:17.3

serum. Find it at kerastas.co.uk or in a kerastar salon near you.

0:22.8

84% based on brushing test. Ban Nutri-fortifiant and mask reconstituitant and serum

0:27.7

anti-shoot fortifiant versus classical shampoo. Here's the new Citron C3 Aircross, the perfect

0:35.2

SUV for bears and lovers of the great outdoors. Sure, and comfort too.

0:41.1

Inside it easily goes from five to seven seats and for you cubs, look, it's got Apple CarPlay and your

0:45.9

favourite apps. Yes, Mr. Grizzly, available in petrol, full electric or hybrid. So ready for a family

0:52.2

adventure? The new Citron C3 Aircross, for lovers of the wilderness and everyday comfort.

0:58.1

Now with a 1,500 pound electric car grant.

1:02.6

The Bert Show.

1:03.7

We almost gave Abby an anxiety attack 60 seconds ago.

1:08.6

Literally.

1:09.0

I'm sitting here and Bert goes off to who knows where. I'm like, okay, he's floating around getting coffee or whatever. Kristen isn't here. Normally we're all here 10 or 15 minutes before the show. Cassie normally slides in but like I don't necessarily count on you to like come in and be chatty at 6 a.m. And so I'm sitting here and Katie's like, are you ready? I'm'm like, ready for what? And she goes, there's a minute until the show. I'm like, are you freaking

1:29.5

kidding me? And so, Bird's got some kind of weird loser 1970s boomer music playing. I'm like, I gotta turn this off real quick. So I'm running there. I'm turning it off. I'm sitting behind the Mike. I'm like, what am I even going to talk about for five minutes? I don't want to talk to myself for

1:43.0

15 minutes. This is why I joined the show in the freaking first place, because I like to talk to

1:46.8

other people, not myself. Well, first of all, that boomer music you're talking about is right from now. That's what I call music 2000s. I didn't recognize it. And the second thing is, had I known how freaked out you are, I would have absolutely stayed outside and watched you start the show by yourself. I mean, we don't care about ratings anymore, so yeah, it could have been entertaining. Here's something weird that's happened since we stopped caring about ratings. They've gone straight up. Dang it. Dang, we should have been doing this for the last decade. Try easier. What the hell, man.

2:18.0

Can you imagine being one of those DJs or a talk show host that has to talk by himself for four or herself for four, five hours? I couldn't even imagine, man. I can imagine. That was my job before I came here. It was just me sitting in a room. And it was, it's awful. It literally, you feel like you're going insane

2:35.1

because you're in this white room with no walls

2:37.5

and you're going insane

2:35.1

because you're in this white room with no walls and you're just like, I have to talk about Taylor Swift by myself for the 400 times, which you think would be my dream and it's not. Oh, honey, that spa, quote-unquote. Was it padded? Those meds they gave me were really good.

...

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