When the emotional abuse stops, can the relationship continue?
Love and Abuse
Paul Colaianni
4.6 • 816 Ratings
🗓️ 12 February 2020
⏱️ 35 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
When the trust breaks and there is no love left in the relationship, but the emotional abuse stops, is there a chance for it to heal and can the trust be re-earned? I read an email from someone who has healed from being the abusive one and wants my thoughts if the marriage will survive or if it's too late.
Love and abuse is the official podcast of The M.E.A.N. Workbook at loveandabuse.com
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to Love and Abuse, the show about helping you identify poisonous communication and toxic behavior. |
| 0:07.4 | You deserve to be treated with respect and kindness. |
| 0:10.9 | That's why it's important that you learn to pinpoint manipulative and controlling behavior so that you keep your power and your sanity. |
| 0:18.6 | I'm your host, Paul Koliani. |
| 0:31.5 | Thank you. power and your sanity. I'm your host, Paul Koliani. Welcome to another episode of love and abuse. As a reminder, all information on this show is meant for educational purposes only, |
| 0:39.4 | and always seek a professional for your mental health and well-being. And I'm going to read you |
| 0:44.4 | a message that I received for my other podcast, The Overwhelmed Brain. I think the question is more |
| 0:51.7 | appropriate for this show, and it's going to be very helpful |
| 0:55.0 | for you listening if you're in any type of relationship that you would consider difficult. |
| 1:02.0 | And I don't call all difficult relationships emotionally abusive or controlling or manipulative. |
| 1:09.1 | I just call emotionally abusive relationships difficult. |
| 1:13.3 | So if you're in a difficult relationship, it doesn't mean there's control, manipulation, |
| 1:18.1 | or emotional abuse going on. It could just mean somebody's stuff is up. Somebody gets triggered. |
| 1:26.0 | Now, there is often emotionally abusive behavior that comes with a difficult |
| 1:32.0 | relationship, but it's good to know that maybe the relationship's going through a phase or some |
| 1:37.4 | sort of trigger that somebody can't let go of. Like when I was married, when I met the person who would be my wife, |
| 1:45.3 | I was triggered in the first week and I held on to that same trigger the eight years we were |
| 1:51.8 | together. I held onto the same trigger and all of my responses, all of my behavior stemmed from that |
| 2:00.8 | trigger. So I was never really happy and neither |
| 2:04.7 | was she. I was never really myself. And how could she be herself if I was always judgmental and |
| 2:12.5 | emotionally abusive toward her? Sometimes we can figure out what these triggers are, talk about them, get through them, |
| 2:20.0 | work them out, and maybe the relationship can survive. But what often happens is that one or both |
... |
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