You would do anything to help your child succeed in life. But what if doing

anything is really not helpful? What if saying no, letting go and allowing natural consequences to enter into your

child's life is actually the best thing? I'm Jean Fuller with Dr. Danny

Werta who heads up our parenting department here at Focus on the Family.

And we're going to turn now to a conversation that Jim Daly and I had with Allison Botkey.

Her son, as a young adult, was wrestling with an addiction, and she had to come to terms with

that and offers great insights about her own personal experience and how you and I can respond

when an adult child is struggling.

And, you know, Allison, one of the things on that guild side, we had a daughter that went to college.

I told her at the beginning, this is a stretch school.

This wasn't in the, kind of the approved list of tuition. the to call her midway through the second semester to say I don't have anymore for you.

We've kind of spent it all and I know you're only a year in but I can't do anymore.

And I felt kind of guilty about that.

I think she would tell you that it was really hard for her at the time.

She's now finishing up her school, but she's been paying for it.

But that was really hard because I wanted her to be there, but she had to learn kind of to own that.

That how do we navigate that guilt and shame? That says a lot about your health, your mental health, and your spiritual health.

This was not my first child.

I had practiced already to some degree.

To be able to do it and to have a support group, people around you, I would imagine you

had a group around you or friends or

and you were healthy enough to handle that sadness or that fear,

...