When did he realize that someone was basically too dumb to breathe?

This guy burned down his convenience store for an insurance claim, but he stopped the milk and

bread deliveries the day before. I demolished my right foot and a bunch of other stuff in a motorcycle

crash, and I had to have the top of my foot removed. Guy I worked with asked me when it would grow back.

I explained that the skin and stuff was going to have to be grafted, but the tendons and

bones that had been removed were gone forever. He looked me dead in the eye and asked,

Well, why don't they just cut the whole freaking thing off and let it grow back?

Going through security and the person says I need to show a different form of ID.

I ask why, because I gave them my driver's license.

They say I needed a US document like a green card or something.

I'm a US citizen.

And then I realized.

I explained how District of Columbia is long for D.C., as in Washington, D.C., as in the capital of our country.

Oh my God, I can relate. I'm from New Mexico. The number of people who think that we're a foreign country is astounding.

Co-worker bought a low-flow showerhead. He filled the bathtub using the new low-flow showerhead

because he thought it would use less water. While driving from one big city to another,

I stopped in a small town to eat at a fast food chain in Texas. I order my food, get my orange

number tent and sit down to wait for my order. The lady who's bringing out orders has this,

I give up, demeanour, as she's calling out numbers that guests just aren't claiming. Each time this

happens, she speaks to a couple of tables to seemingly figure out who the food is for. Then I hear

her call number 55 while holding a tray of food for one person. I was number 54 and noticed I was the only single

party guest to the place. We make eye contact and she heads towards me. She confirms my order

...