When did you get busted in the act?

You know, aside from being caught doing the deed in the back of my car by a police officer,

I don't really have one that's truly horrifying, but I know the rest of the internet does, so let's hear it.

When I was six, I had to go to the bathroom pretty bad, and my father used to tinkle in the backyard all the time.

So I ran out into the back as quickly as possible, and for some reason, don't ask why, I completely

removed my clothing and proceeded to go wee-wee's on our oak tree.

And out of nowhere, I also went number two on myself while standing up.

My parents and three of their friends, who been enjoying their drinks saw the whole thing.

The problem for me wasn't that I got busted, it's that I got busted by the wrong person.

In freshman year in college, I was in the dorms and I had a pretty goofy relationship with my roommate at the time.

I heard his key enter the door, so I decided

to do something funny. So I stood up in the center of our room and shoved my hand into my pants

and began to furiously mime tickling my pickle. I closed my eyes, head banged and waved my other

hand wildly in the air. I heard the door swing open and I just went for it, shaking my head

and both my arms in an exaggerated fashion. When I opened my eyes to see his expression, I realized

I was staring into the eyes of my roommate's father, whom I hadn't met yet. He was helping my

roommate carry some groceries in from the car. He set down the groceries as quickly as he could and then just left.

There was another trip, but he just left those at the door and didn't come inside.

He'd flushed red instantly.

In short, my freshman college roommate's dad walked in on my imitation of

Wacking the Mule wildly in the center of the room. It was the first time we'd

met. At the Mall of America, walking around the upper balcony, when the floor started shaking

...