What's your, I'm not even supposed to be here today, story?

When I was in middle school, my mum went to work before I woke up, so I always got myself

to school alone. On this particular rainy, windy day, I decided to accidentally sleep until

11 a.m. I lived in northern Colorado where there are hardly any tornadoes, but when I

turned on the TV, there was a serious tornado warning for my exact area. We lived in a tiny apartment

on the third floor, and all of the neighbors were kind of sketchy. So I was alone and panicking,

just wishing I'd gone to school. By then, the weather was too severe to walk the

mile to my school, so I hid in the bathroom and accepted my fate, and eventually the weather cleared up.

Missed my flight off Kauai, and got on the next flight to Oahu. Flight was 20 minutes. Takeoff was

fine, and we were ascending normally, until the plane jolted with such severity as I rose out of my seat,

I saw a flight attendant hit their head on the ceiling. People started screaming. The plane was tossed up and down and whipped side to side.

I grabbed the arms to my chair like it was a jetpack and held on for dear life. This continued for whole minutes.

All I could think was, this is how I die. I'm not even supposed to be on this flight.

What a terrible way to end this vacation. Eventually it stopped and the pilot came on over

Intercom and apologized for the turbulence and told us that the drink service would be suspended.

I don't care about juice at this

point, buddy. Get this plane on the fricking ground. Working in a thrift store, covering another manager's

shift so she could take her birthday off. Right after I clock in, I see a woman stuffing her purse

with used bras and undies, and then try to make a run for the front door.

I got as far as saying,

Excuse me, ma'am, before she screams and upends her extra large Taco Bell cup

full of Mountain Dew Livewire over my head.

...