4.8 • 1.7K Ratings
🗓️ 20 August 2024
⏱️ 51 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
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It’s believed 1 in 6 people are narcissistic. Dealing with a narcissist can be exhausting, often involving manipulation, gaslighting, and emotional abuse. Rebecca Zung, a top-rated attorney and expert on narcissism, breaks down how to recognize and deal with narcissistic personalities in both personal and professional settings. She teaches methods for negotiating with narcissists and emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries, protecting your energy, and understanding that narcissists operate from a place of fear and childhood trauma.
Rebecca Zung is a top-rated attorney, recognized by U.S. News & World Report as a Best Lawyer in America. She's the author of bestselling books on divorce and negotiation, including "Negotiate Like You MATTER" with a foreword by Robert Shapiro. A sought-after expert, Rebecca has been featured on major media outlets like Extra, Forbes, and NPR. Based in Los Angeles, she continues to share her expertise through keynote speeches, media appearances, podcasts, and on-demand programs.
The Signs of Narcissism: Be wary of people who seem too good to be true, mirror your interests perfectly, push for quick commitments, or react poorly to boundaries. These are potential red flags for narcissistic behavior.
Narcissists Operate Differently: Narcissists are motivated by "narcissistic supply" and may not respond to rational arguments. Their behavior is often rooted in childhood trauma, leading to emotional regulation issues and "narcissistic blindness" when triggered.
Use the SLAY Method When Dealing With Narcissists: Strategy (define your goals), Leverage (identify their sources of supply), Anticipate (understand their type), and You (maintain your authentic power). This helps in negotiations or conflicts with narcissists.
Set Strong Boundaries: Set clear boundaries, avoid JADE (Justify, Argue, Defend, Explain), use specific language, and remember that you're entitled to respect. Developing these skills can help protect your mental health and achieve better outcomes when interacting with narcissists.
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Links for Rebecca
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0:00.0 | When you're in Winter's favorite town, the snow-covered mountains surround you. |
0:07.0 | A historic Main Street charms you. |
0:17.0 | And every day brings a new adventure. |
0:22.0 | Welcome to Park City, Utah. Naturally, Winter's favorite town. |
0:25.0 | Join the experience at visit Park City.com. |
0:30.0 | I've been a magnet for narcissists my entire life. Can you tell me why? |
0:34.0 | Narcissists don't attach themselves to you because you have so little value, they attach themselves to you because you have so much. |
0:41.0 | The myth is that narcissists just want to win. That is not true. |
0:47.0 | They also love the game of manipulating. |
0:51.0 | Oftentimes tell all narcissists just to go away and you're just going to go away. |
0:54.7 | It sounds to me like you have to fight. |
0:57.1 | I always say that narcissists are way more afraid of you than you are of them. |
1:02.1 | So what you have to do is... |
1:05.6 | Rebecca, thanks for joining me today on the Mark Devine show. Superstoke to meet you. |
1:08.8 | So great to meet you too. Yeah. So I've been a magnet for narcissists my entire life. Oh no. Can you tell me why? |
1:17.4 | Obviously I must have grown up with a pretty strong narcissistic, you know, energy in my family I think probably both my |
1:24.2 | mom and dad but is that a pretty common thing you know if you grow up with |
1:28.0 | narcissists you tend to be like a magnet for them? |
1:30.3 | Or you become one I think is what happens. I know I've used to say that I was too, but you know, you definitely want to keep that energy away from you now. I say, I think what happens is the sense vulnerabilities in people and if you |
1:48.2 | tend to have that vulnerability it's almost like sharks with blood in the water, like they see that. And if you don't have that |
1:58.0 | vulnerability and you learn to close off that vulnerability, then they're not going to come near you anymore. I always say it's sort of like |
2:05.7 | Linda the Good Witch and the Wizard of Oz. You remember how the Wicked Witch came near her and she said go away you don't have any power here go away and the |
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