What Is Covenant Eyes? Jesus Gets An Account To Investigate
The God Pod
God
4.7 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 14 November 2023
⏱️ 60 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
God complains that Jesus can’t be more like that Mr. Beast. God and Jesus react to the latest Marvel flop as well as the amazing ‘Loki’ finale. Jesus signed up for his own account on the ‘Covenant Eyes’ monitoring app, and has much to report.
God and Jesus celebrate the big election victories in Ohio. God personally rebukes J.D. Vance. Finally, God delivers a NEW COMMANDMENT on ‘No Nut November.’
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | It seems like everyone is either starting a side hustle or becoming their own boss. |
| 0:06.0 | And you know what they're hearing a lot? |
| 0:08.0 | It's the sound of another sale on Shopify. |
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| 0:16.0 | Sign up for a one-pound per month trial period at Shopify.co. UK slash sell 23, all lowercase. Whether you're selling loafers |
| 0:26.5 | Shopify simplifies selling online and in person. Covering all sales channels from a shop front, POS system, to its all in one e-commerce platform. |
| 0:37.0 | Shopify even gets you selling across social media marketplaces, |
| 0:41.0 | with their 24-7 help and extensive business course library. |
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| 0:48.0 | Go to Shopify.co. UK slash sell 23 to take your business to the next level today that shopify dot code |
| 0:55.9 | UK slash sell 23 this week on the god pod you should point the finger back at me. |
| 1:03.8 | Well, that's what I mean, I did say you wouldn't let me return to Earth. |
| 1:07.8 | But what about you, God? I mean, why aren't you doing these wonderful things? |
| 1:11.6 | I admit it. I am powerless and don't have any money oh okay |
| 1:15.4 | I should have just taken that strategy I mean you you at least you have like the |
| 1:19.5 | ability to turn water into wine. Loki is a god that I've always felt Simpatico with because he's a huge fucking loser too. |
| 1:31.0 | Like that's his thing. |
| 1:32.0 | Oh, and everybody thinks he's this piece of |
| 1:34.7 | shit for the bad things that he's done before in the past, just like me. And you |
| 1:39.6 | know what it is folks? He is filled with glorious purpose. |
| 1:44.4 | You're the King of Kings and that must make me the Emperor. |
| 1:50.0 | I'm the King of Kings, but I also wouldn't mind if we started having elections here. |
... |
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