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Triumph 111. Eric, welcome to the program.

Thank you Dr. Laura Sussan. I appreciate your let me call in.

Great. So what gaps? I'm sure a wonderful woman fill up.

My wife and I have been married 30 years this December. 30 years ago we went through Marital counseling and during that Marital counseling the

doctor told us that Eric you are rigid. You are by the book you have no fun unless you plan it. He said your wife is like a fart in a whirlwind just both all over the place.

He said you need her to get you out of your richness but she needs you because you're like the strings to a kite.

That's been exactly what's been for the last 30 years where I am weak. She is my strength and where she is weak I am her strength and two kids and six grandchildren later she is still the love of my life and I will do it all over again in the heartbeat.

What do you think so many of your male friends don't have what you have in the marriage?

For the younger generation I think they want it without the work. For the older generation who know marriage is work.

The relationship is work. Nothing comes free in this life. You have to work for it. My wife and I have had ups and downs and we have cried.

What work? What do you mean by work? That sounds so grim. What do you mean by work?

By work means doing things for your spouse that you don't want to do. When you wake up in the morning and the first thing you want to do is take a shower or a tea, have breakfast.

Instead I walk over to the coffee machine and make a cup of coffee and I don't even drink coffee. I go over and beyond little things here and there whether it be just the other day she was washing her, she went to prepare a socks on and inside that sock was a five hour bill.

She knew that was my gift language to her of love. Just a surprise, a little five hour bill that she can use to go do whatever she wants to do.

She does the same thing for me. It's work. It doesn't sound like work, but it is.

How about we, I guess when you talk about making coffee, that doesn't sound like work. It sounds like selfless effort. Work makes it seem grim.

People, there are some jobs that you go to, people love to go to work because they love what they do. There are some jobs that you hate what you do. It's the work that is bad. For my wife and I work, the things I do for my wife, like laundry, I'll do laundry. It's work.

I love doing it because I know it pleases her. It helps her out. In exchange, she'll do something for me out of the blue that she doesn't like to do.

Of course, we have our hobbies that we do together and love to do together. Over the 30 years of being married and never using the word divorce.

Whenever we got in a fight, that was our rule number one. Whenever we got in a fight, we never used the word divorce. Never. And we never went to bed angry.

We always talked to one another and said why we were feeling the way we were feeling and we always made up. And sometimes the making up part was even better than being mad.

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