I'm fat and poor. That's how we all feel coming out of quarantine. We've spent the past few weeks suddenly homeschooling our kids were stuck in our houses for the longest time we had no toilet paper

paper towels suddenly seemed like a really exciting thing in your life

dealing with Zoom calls,

am I on mute?

No, I think you're on mute.

Am I doing the Zoom sign language?

Where it's like, no, I think you're the one on mute.

You know what got us through all of this is we search for random things on Amazon,

we compulsively hit Add to Kart, or better yet I got a lot of use out of the Buy It Now button. Let's just know let's

Let's skip the formalities just get this on the way to my house and we did it all with a family sized bag of the extra crispy pretzels in one hand and a gin and tonic and the other.

And now we are faced with the consequences of those choices.

Did anyone else actually wonder at any point

if something happened to their drier during quarantine that it shrunk their clothes. I was putting

on jeans the other day and I actually thought, man we need a new dryer. I mean it's funny that we've had this for seven years.

Never noticed a problem with it before, but now I can't button my genes. What is with this, this is,

this dryer sucks, we, I'm absolutely we need to need to get a new one there's a real problem with this dryer

You know didn't occur to me that maybe it was my newly developed love of extra spicy Cheetos.

Not that I generally like extra spicy Cheetos,

but they're the only ones left in the grocery store. No, that couldn't have anything to do with it's probably the

dryer. Then we're getting the credit card bill from the Amazon purchases. That's

fun. I don't know what got in my head during quarantine, but I took our entire savings account

and I just mentally categorized it as monopoly money.

...