on LBC.

Three minutes after 12 is a time.

A very good afternoon indeed to you.

If you're not familiar with this part of the programme,

then allow me to suggest very modestly that you're in for something of a treat.

This is your weekly opportunity to achieve the sort of enlightenment

that's fast going out of fashion in the current climate.

It's a celebration of knowledge, of education, of expertise.

But don't feel excluded if you don't think that you are an expert, because you might have

watched something on telly last night that qualifies you to ask a question. Answer a question,

I beg you pardon. It's the radio equivalent, if you will, of those newspaper features,

where a reader writes in, asks a question, and a few weeks later they get an answer from another reader. Except it's much funnier

than that, and much more exciting, and

much much sexier. Seriously, it's

brilliant.

It needs numbers.

3, 4, 5, 60609,

73 is the number that you need.

If you have a question, a who, or why, a what, or where, or when, a whither, whence, even the occasional wherefore, why do we do that? Where does that come from? What's that all about? Why are we, why, where, when, anything, anything at all, as long as it's not boring. You might not know whether or not something is boring. So we reserve judgment on that. I'm afraid you'll be politely invited to move

along if Rosie and Caroline consider your inquiry to be rubbish. The only other circumstances in

which I'd rather you didn't get on air is repetition, but that's entirely my lookout really these days.

You can go to lbc.co.com.uk, have a look at the archive. It's great fun, actually.

...