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The Bert Show

Vault: Is This Myth About Pools the Biggest Lie of Your Childhood?

The Bert Show

The Bert Show

News, Comedy, Entertainment News, Society & Culture

4.14.4K Ratings

🗓️ 9 April 2026

⏱️ 11 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Vault: Is This Myth About Pools the Biggest Lie of Your Childhood?

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

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0:55.5

including important safety information, Wagobe, clinical study information, and restrictions, visit Forhurst.com. The Bird Show. I have a story about water and a pool that I wanted to relate to you guys because I made the sad realization recently at a pool party that it's not just kids that pee in the kitty pool.

1:12.6

Gross.

1:13.0

And the reason I say this is because I was at a pool party and we were just, and it was a, you know,

1:17.8

it was a public pool.

1:19.7

And I won't say where it is.

1:21.8

It was a pool that was outside pool somewhere.

1:24.7

And so there was the adult pool and the kitty pool separated. So it's like some sort

1:29.6

of community center. Not necessarily, but I'm just, whatever. I'm not saying where it is. So there's

1:35.0

an adult pool and then there's a kitty pool. And so there wasn't, I mean, it was during the day

1:40.8

and everybody was hanging out and laying out and stuff. And so I was laying and so I noticed and it was just our our group there and one of the women in the group got up

1:50.0

and said you don't think anybody mind you know me getting in the kitty pool do you you know like

1:54.9

to us like you because there's no kids around so it's no big deal right because she was saying

1:58.8

out she was hot but she still wanted to lay out so she she laid in the kitty pool and just kind of had her arms outstretched on the concrete and just laid back. Okay, I need a definite definition of exactly what the kitty pool is. This isn't one little itty-bitty inflatable pool where the kids are playing in? No, you're in a public pool where you have the adult pool and then the kid pool over to the side. So like at a community, like Jim was describing, a community center, a country club, a hotel. It's shared water? It's not shared water. They're separated. And that's important right there. Yes. And so she's sitting in the kitty pool laid back and hanging out. So I didn't think anything about because I thought, well, she, you know, she was hot and, but she didn't want to get in the adult pool because she didn't want to get her hair wet, right? So, okay, fun, no big deal. I'm laying out, laying out. Okay, then she gets up and goes back to her lounge chair. No big deal. And then soon after a family comes in and there's a little girl that starts heading to the kitty pool and I heard her say oh no oh no oh no and I was like well what's wrong and she confessed to me that she hit was she was she was

2:56.0

peeing in the kiddie pool and that's why she went in there instead of going to the bathroom the public

3:01.2

bathroom was literally near us I mean there was there was a there was a women's and men's bathroom do that you that? How old is this woman? She had to be in her 30s.

3:10.8

You're kidding. And peed in the kitty pool when nobody else was there because for some reason she couldn't walk 15 feet to the public bathroom.

...

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