The Bird Show.

Got to get Bert Show listener Mark on the phone. Hey, Mark.

Hey, guys.

How are you doing, man?

Well, I'm in a bit of a pickle, you might say.

Mark's been a bad, bad, bad boy.

All right.

Yeah.

What happened?

Bring it.

Well, basically, I have a long, well, basically ex-girlfriend at this point we dated for uh got two and a half

years or so and had down the old marriage path and we got a condo and we got a car which is in her name because I have, you know, student loaned, a little

screwy credit that I used to go to work with every single day and we're not together now

and she's got my car hostage.

Hold on a second.

You're missing a couple of things here. All right. I read the email, my friend. You are telling a story like a guilty guy. Yada, yada, yada, yada. We broke up. Yada, yada, yada. You screwed around on her. Yeah. He's like, yeah. Yeah. An important piece of the puzzle because... But she's holding my car hostage. Yeah, I've got to go to work, and I have stuff I need for work in the car. She will not let me use the car. She won't let me talk to her to get the car. Stop for a second. Stop for a second. Another thing that I do have to point out is the fact that since you had shoddy credit,

that she helped you out by getting the car using her name and her credit to get it.

Yeah, but I didn't screw up her credit.

I paid, I have paid every single month for 18 months already and haven't missed the payment.

How much money have you invested in this car already?

$11,000. $11,000? Yeah. Bigger, better question for you. Who just grew around with and where'd you do it and how'd she find out? Yeah, the details of this are going to be important because, I mean, if you did something really, really dumb, because if you were like, I mean, if you went over the top and you did something really stupid, like you screwed around with her sister, of course she's not going to help you out. Well, I didn't. So what's the big deal? Who'd you screw around with? Her cousin. Her cousin? Yes, like a second cousin. More like a family friend. Seriously? She's like one of our friends. Come on, Mark, be a man. Stand up. You did it. Tell it. You're the one that called us, man. So come clean. Well, the reason I called, you know, I mean, I listen to you guys. But I don't know how a guy who calls radio, you know, radio shows. She listens to you all the time.

She will not take my phone call.

...