The Bert Show.

What did you do this weekend, Bert?

It's sort of like my birthday is tomorrow, so we did family birthday night, and from my birthday, we went to go see How to Train a Dragon. Nice. I really wanted to see that movie. That's cool. Did you already see it? Yes, this is the second time, but this is 3D. Oh, it's different. Yeah, so we did that together as a family on Friday night for my birthday. How to train your dragon?

How long until they make a porn out of that? 3D. Oh. Okay. Yeah, so we did that together as a family on Friday night for my birthday.

How to train your dragon?

How long until they make a porn out of that?

Oh, Jeff, how to train his tracks.

And on Saturday night, Stacy had a surprise for me.

We went over to the mansion, spent the night there and got a couple's massage On Saturday night Which was cool Who was the other person It was with Well it's a couple's massage So a couple Massages you And then you massage another couple What's one of those You know what I was different It's a little differently Happy birthday Hey I've seen that Hey. I've seen that check. Craigress. I can't have a lot side of the door. Yeah. So that was really the weekend right there. I'm going low key this year. First, Stacey's has a big birthday coming up in May. And I'm just not feeling celebrating a huge birthday this year. Are you, like, feeling resistant to your age, or is it just, like, because

it's not a big number, you don't really care? You know, I had to talk with my dad about this the other day, and he told me, I'm sorry. Wait, hold on. Yeah, my dad and I've been talking a lot lately. That's a sentence you have really never said. I told you guys that we reconnected a couple of months ago. I did tell you that. Nope. I didn't.

You sure? You kind of forgot about that one. You left it out.

Didn't think you were speaking to either person. I told you guys that we reconnected a couple of months ago. I did tell you that. Nope. I didn't.

You got to forgot about that one. You left it out.

Didn't think you were speaking to either parent right now. Yeah. Mom is in solitary confinement. Dad and I are working on it now, though. Yeah. So we're probably talking to each other once a week. Wow. Really? to come out over the summer and hang with the family and everything.

So we're working on that.

Okay.

So this weekend we were talking about age and stuff, and he's 73, and he's in bad shape. He's got emphysema. He's got an oxygen tank tied to his back right now. And we were laughing. He's going on a cruise, and we were laughing about him being in his bathing suit with an oxygen tank on his back, which is a real hot look. And he said to me that, you know, it doesn't matter how old you get. Your mind never catches up to your body. Your mind always thinks you're younger than you are and that never, ever, ever goes away. So even at 73, he gets up in the morning and he thinks that he's healthy and he can run and he can do all these things.

But then he remembers he's got a tote around an oxygen mask, you know.

And this is really the first year that I'm celebrating a birthday where I feel my age.

I think because of the knee and I'm just, I feel old.

Like my body feels banged up.

I'm 43 tomorrow and I feel like I'm 60 something.

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