Good afternoon. The purpose of today's statement is just for me to lament a few things I personally

cannot do and then remind people who can do those things that it'd be great if they would.

I am not a member of the rock band, the Rolling Stones. It is not in my purview to get up on stage

in front of tens of thousands of screaming fans and belt out numbers like satisfaction. You can't

always get what you want and honky-tongue women. If I were able to do these things, I would do them.

The existing guidelines for a Rolling Stones concert do not provide for me to take the stage

in that fashion. But the songs are there. They are well documented. They are not mine to sing.

Please, Rolling Stones, do your job.

The second, I am not a bird. On many occasions I have dreamed of taking flight,

soaring across the sky and feeling the air under my wings as I glide over mountains and lakes.

This is something I would do if it were in my power.

Existing human guidelines do not give me this power. It is clear however that birds

do enjoy the power of flight. On behalf of all of us, I ask birds, please do your job.

I think it would be awesome to play basketball in the NBA. As I have not been hired by one of the

teams in the league, it is not in my power to do that. It never was. I have been very clear about this.

If I had this power, I would use it. NBA players have the power to play in NBA games.

Please, NBA players, do your job. And finally, as I read the relevant statutes, I am not allowed

to take action against a sitting president with regard to clear obstruction of justice.

There is a body that is designed to do this. It's called Congress. Congress, do your job.