Welcome to the Bloody Disgusting Network.

The ensuing show will change, transform, and otherwise alter you.

Good luck. Black Cats and Goblins and Crumbets and Ghosts, Cubbons of Witches with all their hosts.

You may think they scare me, you're probably right.

Black Cats and Gob goblins on Halloween night.

Trick-or-treat!

Happy Halloween, trick-or-treaters, dreamers, campers, and suspects.

Welcome back to another episode of Halloweenies.

I'm your host for today, Michael Myers-Roffman,

and while we're done carving out the pumpkin that is Halloween kills.

Available for streaming now via peacock, mind you.

We're still in Hadn't Field, Illinois,

where the mobs are mean, the streets aren't clean,

and the system is completely broken to borrow from our

Yazz Queen Lori Strode. Now you'd think at least given our four hour review we'd be done with this small Midwestern town.

No, no, no.

Or hope.

Or hope.

At least until next year's Halloween ends, right?

But look, we promised a full month in Attenfield and we are giving you a

full month in Hadenfield and tonight we went trick-or-treating. We hit up all our

favorite locales. We went to the Wallace House, the Doyle House,

...