Trial By Kombat

Judge John Hodgman

Jesse Thorn

World, Show, Complete, Hodgeman, Comedy, Pc, Daily, Hodgman, Mac, More, Expertise, Knowledge, Information

4.8 • 7.7K Ratings

🗓️ 25 November 2015

⏱️ 58 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Laura has refused to play Mortal Kombat with her boyfriend Austin since he began doing extensive research and practice outside of their video game sessions. Should Austin come back down to her level so they can play a beloved game together? CAN he even do so? Guest Bailiffed by David Rees!

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to the Judge John Hodgman podcast. I'm your guest bailiff David Reese. This week,
0:08.0	trial by combat. Austin brings the case against his girlfriend Laura. They enjoy playing
0:13.5	video games together, but Laura has put the kibosh on their favorite fighter game. She
0:18.4	says Austin is too good and has taken the fun out of playing together. Austin says he's
0:23.1	just playing the best that he can and wants Laura to resume their friendly video game matches.
0:27.6	Who's right? Who's wrong? Please rise as Judge John Hodgman enters the courtroom and issues
0:33.4	the obscure cultural reference. Those cute little pack men with their special nicknames that
0:39.6	dinky signature tune, the dot munching lemon that goes wacko, wacko, wacko, wacko, wacko,
0:45.0	wacko. The machine has an air of childish whimsicality. Do I take risks in order to gobble up
0:53.1	the fruit symbol in the middle of the screen? I do not, and neither should you. Like the fat
1:00.0	and harmless saucer and missile command, the fruit symbol is there simply to tempt you into
1:05.7	hubristic sorties. Pack man player be not proud, nor too macho, and you will prosper on the dotted
1:14.4	screen. Yes, bailiff David Reese, swear them in. Austin and Laura, please rise and raise your
1:21.1	right hands. Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth,
1:26.5	so help you God or whatever? I do. I do. Do you swear to abide by Judge John Hodgman's ruling?
1:34.9	I do. Thank you. Judge Hodgman, you may proceed. Thank you very much, Guest bailiff. David Reese,
1:40.8	Austin and Laura, you may be seated. Welcome back, David Reese, by the way. Thank you for being here.
1:46.6	Again, now in week two or perhaps three depending on airing of your new television show or your
1:53.4	new old television show, going deep with David Reese season two on Esquire. Thank you for having me.
1:58.8	It's my pleasure. Now that we're into the run of the shows and the response has been incredible.
2:06.6	Over the moon. How are you credible? We presume it will be so because we're recording this before
2:13.0	premieres, but how have you enjoyed it so far? Well, you know, I love a ticker tape parade.
	...

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