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Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children

TPP 497: The Inner Work Behind Staying Present, with Matthew Fishleder

Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children

Debbie Reber

Education, Kids & Family, Parenting

4.8 • 1K Ratings

🗓️ 31 March 2026

⏱️ 34 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Today we’re turning the lens inward and talking about the inner life of parents—especially those of us raising neurodivergent kids. My guest is Matthew Fishleder, a licensed marriage and family therapist who works with adults navigating anxiety, life transitions, and the emotional complexity of being human. A central focus of Matthew’s work is supporting parents in understanding their own worry, guilt, and burnout—not as personal failures, but as understandable responses to chronic stress. In our conversation, we explore what’s actually happening when parents get stuck in chronic worry about their child’s future, how self-criticism takes root, and why tending to our own inner world is foundational to our kids’ sense of safety. Matthew shares practical, compassionate strategies for relating differently to anxiety so we can show up with more steadiness, presence, and connection—even in the most activated moments. About Matthew Fishleder Matthew Fishleder is a psychotherapist licensed in California and Maryland who works with adults navigating anxiety, life transitions, and the emotional complexity of being human. One focus of his work is the inner life of parents, especially those raising neurodivergent kids. His approach is neurodiversity affirming and grounded in humanistic and acceptance based frameworks. Matthew helps parents understand worry, guilt, and burnout as understandable responses to chronic stress, and supports them in relating differently to anxiety and self criticism so they can show up with more presence, steadiness, and connection. Things you'll learn from this episode  How tending to a parent’s inner life and emotional awareness strengthens the entire family system Why chronic worry and anxiety are understandable responses to parenting—and how to relate to them differently How parenthood reshapes identity and invites ongoing self-discovery Why normalizing difficult emotions reduces shame and builds emotional resilience How cultivating self-regulation and holistic self-awareness helps parents show up with steadiness and presence Resources mentioned  Growing Present (Matt’s website) Internal Family Systems Laura Key on ADHD Aha Moments, Parenting, and Burnout (Full-Tilt Parenting) An Interview with Dr. Dan Siegel About The Yes Brain (Full-Tilt Parenting) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

I'm Debbie Reber and this is full tilt parenting.

0:05.0

Today we are turning the lens inward and talking about the inner life of parents,

0:10.1

especially those of us, you guys out there listening to this show, raising neurodivergent

0:14.0

kids.

0:14.7

My guest is Matthew Fish Leader, a licensed marriage and family therapist who works with

0:19.4

adults navigating anxiety,

0:21.2

life transitions, and just the emotional complexity of being human.

0:25.3

Essential focus of Matthew's work is supporting parents in understanding their own worry,

0:29.7

guilt, and burnout as understandable responses to chronic stress.

0:34.2

His approach is neurodiversity affirming and it's grounded in humanistic acceptance-based

0:39.2

frameworks. So today we're going to explore what's actually happening when parents get stuck

0:44.1

in chronic worry about their kids' future, how self-criticism takes root, and why tending to

0:49.5

our own inner world is foundational to our kids' sense of safety. Matthew will share practical,

0:55.2

compassionate strategies for relating differently to anxiety so we can show up with more steadiness,

1:00.4

more presence, and more connection, even in those moments when we're activated the most.

1:05.1

So here is Matthew Fish Leader on the inner work behind staying present.

1:11.7

Hey, Matthew, welcome to the podcast.

1:14.4

Thanks so much for having me.

1:15.9

Yeah, I'm curious to see where we go in this conversation today,

1:19.8

but I'd love to hear a little bit more about you.

1:23.0

So just give us a little bit about your background and the lens through which you do the work

1:26.5

that you do, and maybe as part of that, your personal why.

...

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