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Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children

TPP 342a: Dr. Devorah Heitner on Parenting Kids Who Are Growing Up in Public

Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children

Debbie Reber

Education, Kids & Family, Parenting

4.81K Ratings

🗓️ 31 October 2025

⏱️ 54 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Today, we’re talking about such a pressing consideration for anyone raising a kid these days — what it means for today’s generation of kids to grow up with very public lives and coming of age in a digital world where so many aspects of their lives are online and available for public consumption, not to mention that much of their important work of identity formation is being shaped by the media and technology they interact with. My guest, Devorah Heitner, gets into all of this in her brand new and essential book for any parent, Growing Up in Public: Coming of Age in a Digital World. For this conversation, I asked Devorah to talk us through what I see as some of the more pressing issues for parents like us, including how to balance a child’s right to privacy in their texts and online lives with valid concerns about online influences and engagement when that child is dealing with anxiety, depression or other mental health disorder, the impact of social media on kids who may already be struggling to fit in and find their people, and how many homework and grading apps used by schools may actually be undermining our kids development of executive function skills and creating additional stress for parents.   Things you'll learn How to navigate the transition from being highly involved in a children’s tech life to respecting their privacy Why violating our kids’ trust by reading their texts will drive them further apart from us What to track or monitor when your child is dealing with anxiety, depression, or other mental health disorders How engaging in social media may impact kids who are struggling to fit in and find their people Why social media can act as an intensifier for whatever kids are experiencing and how it causes a dip in self-esteem What sharenting is and how to navigate permissions, cleaning up past shares, and more Why apps like ClassDojo are particularly challenging for families with differently-wired students How grading apps often work against differently wired students Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

Hey, it's Debbie. For the month of October, I'll be sharing some of my favorite past episodes

0:05.0

relating to all things tech and screens. So every Friday this month, you'll find an episode

0:10.1

on your full-tilt parenting feed on topics like gaming, internet rabbit holes, and navigating

0:15.4

screen time. So if your child's relationship with technology is something you're grappling with,

0:20.6

these are for you.

0:23.9

I'm Debbie Reber and welcome to Tilt Parenting, a podcast featuring interviews and conversations

0:29.0

aimed at inspiring, informing, and supporting parents raising differently wired kids.

0:34.1

I'm so excited to be bringing back to the show my friend, colleague, and my most trusted

0:39.0

mentor when it comes to all things kids and tech and screens, Dr. Devorah Heitner. If Devorah's

0:45.2

name's familiar to you, she has joined me a few times before to talk about prioritizing mentoring

0:50.3

over monitoring when it comes to screen time and what to do when our kids go down a

0:55.0

potentially unsafe internet rabbit hole. But today, we're going to be talking about such

1:00.4

a pressing consideration for anyone raising a kid these days. What it means for today's

1:05.4

generation of kids to grow up with very public lives and coming of age in a digital world where so many aspects

1:12.6

of their lives are online and available for public consumption, not to mention that much of their

1:18.1

important work of identity formation is being shaped by the media and technology that they're

1:23.2

interacting with. DeVore gets into all of this and her brand new and I think essential book for any

1:28.8

parent, growing up in public, coming of age in a digital world. Devora is also the author of

1:34.9

Screenwise, helping kids thrive and survive in their digital world. Her work has appeared in the

1:40.3

New York Times, The Washington Post, the Wall Street Journal, and CNN opinion.

1:44.8

She has a PhD in Media Technology and Society from Northwestern University and is taught at

1:50.6

DePaul and Northwestern. A fair warning, this is a longer episode than usual, but it's all

...

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