On this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse Q&A, everyone.

I am Brandon Chadwick, and today we are going to discuss the benefits an abuser gets from

their abusive behavior. But before we get to that, if you want to be a guest on our Survivor

Story episodes, please do go to our website at Narcissistapocalypse.com. Top of the page, there's a button that says

guest form. When you click on that button, it takes you to our guest form page. There, you can read all of our

instructions, and either send us an email at Narcissistapocalypse.g.com or fill out our guest

form and press the submit button. And please do send it in the format that we ask for. So today we are going to be discussing

the benefits and abuser gets from their abusive behavior, why it is desirable to them,

what are the rewards, and how do these things get reinforced. And the information today is

coming from Lundy Bancroft's book. Why does he do that?

It is a wonderful book. We've done episodes from parts of this book before. So please go by this

book. It is a very good book for anyone who is experiencing abuse and is trying to figure out

what is going on or even in the aftermath to really understand what has

happened and who you were dealing with in the who what wears and whys of everything.

So here is an example from why does he do that by Lundy Bancroft and it's all about the setting

that happens in the kitchen about about abusive behavior that happens,

and then the next time they're in this kitchen in the exact same scenario.

So in this example, a parent, and most likely the husband, is having dinner with their spouse and kids.

The abuser is irritable, criticizing everybody during the meal.

And when the abuser finishes eating, they leave the table abruptly. And then someone at the table

might say to the parent, hey, can you help wash the dishes? Today is your day to wash the dishes.

And a rage starts. The abuser starts raging.

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