Top 10 Marriage Mistakes: Mistake #2 | Ep. 410

Awesome Marriage Podcast

Dr. Kim Kimberling

Relationships, Society & Culture, Religion & Spirituality, Christianity

4.9 • 813 Ratings

🗓️ 28 April 2020

⏱️ 33 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina talk about the #2 Marriage Mistake Dr. Kim sees in marriages, which is not listening to your spouse.

Hearing is not the same thing as listening.

So what does it look like to listen to your spouse well? How can we become better listeners? Dr. Kim shares practical advice on how to avoid this marriage mistake.

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.

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*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!

NOTEWORTHY QUOTES

"With all the distractions that are out there today, you really have to focus and be intentional about communicating with your spouse." - Dr. Kim Kimberling
"It feels very lonely when our spouse is not listening to us." - Christina Dodson
"I don't think you can have an awesome marriage without having awesome listening skills." - Christina Dodson
"I don't think you can multitask and really be listening to someone." - Dr. Kim Kimberling
"Your spouse should always have a direct line of communication to get to you." - Christina Dodson
"Your spouse feels loved and cared for when they know they are heard in your marriage." - Dr. Kim Kimberling
"We can learn how to listen from God, God is the best listener." - Dr. Kim Kimberling

Transcript

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0:00.0	Today we are talking about the number two marriage mistake that Dr. Kim sees in marriages,
0:11.8	which is not listening to your spouse. Hearing is not the same thing as listening. So what does it
0:16.7	look like to listen to your spouse well? How can we become better listeners? Dr. Kim shares practical
0:22.2	advice on how to avoid this marriage mistake. This was such a good conversation and Dr. Kim
0:26.7	shared some real helpful advice that honestly left me really convicted. And Dr. Kim even left
0:32.1	convicted as well. So I think this is an area that we can all grow in. We pray this episode as helpful
0:36.9	to you and your marriage.
0:40.2	Welcome to the awesome marriage podcast, a place for honest conversations about marriage and
0:44.6	practical advice on how to have a God-honoring awesome marriage. I am your co-host, Christina
0:49.4	Dodson. On the show will be your host, Dr. Kim Kimmerling. Dr. Kim is a marriage counselor and has been married for over 50 years.
0:56.8	His passion is to help you strengthen your most intimate relationship.
1:09.2	So, Dr. Kim, what do you mean by not listening to your spouse?
1:13.6	I think it's where, you know, there's so much in communication.
1:16.6	And sometimes we think we express ourselves really well, but there's so much in listening.
1:21.6	And so I think when we don't listen to her spouse, when me, when Nancy say I don't listen,
1:25.9	I'm not focusing, I'm thinking about something else, I'm distracted, or she tells me something and I just totally disregard it or
1:33.2	act like it's not important. And so in those ways, instead of interacting and processing with
1:38.2	her, if I just take that attitude, she's going to feel I didn't listen to her. And so it,
1:42.5	and that's caused us some real problems when that happens.
1:45.3	Absolutely. Absolutely. I kind of think of it in like three parts. There's not listening as in like you're literally distracted and not even hearing your spouse. There's not listening as in you're hearing your spouse, but you're going to disregard what they say and not do not do not follow through and not follow through with the actions afterwards. And then there's not listening as in you are listening, but there's no active listening.
2:04.2	And so it feels like you're not listening, which that all matters a lot.
2:08.0	Like your sauce has to feel like you're listening and know you're listening, not just you argue with them while I am listening.
	...

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