Tommy and The Malicious Controlling Father

Narcissist Apocalypse: Patterns of Abuse

Abuse Survivor Network

Relationships, Society & Culture, Education, Self-improvement, True Crime

4.7 • 796 Ratings

🗓️ 7 June 2026

⏱️ 55 minutes

🔗️ Recording | Apple Podcasts | RSS

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Summary

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Brandon talks with Tommy, a survivor of childhood abuse who grew up as the scapegoat child of a malicious controlling father. From public humiliation and body shaming to gaslighting, circular logic, physical abuse, and impossible expectations, Tommy spent his childhood walking on eggshells while desperately trying to avoid becoming his father's next target. As the abuse intensified, Tommy learned to stay invisible, seek refuge at friends' homes, and eventually turn to alcohol to numb the anxiety, fear, and emotional pain that followed him into adulthood. Years later, after struggling with addiction, relapse, and grief, Tommy began confronting the root causes of his suffering and rebuilding his life through recovery.

Transcript

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0:00.0	On this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, we talk with an abuse survivor named Tommy, and Tommy was raised by a malicious controlling father.
0:11.6	It's a story of impossible expectations, humiliation, circular logic, addiction, gaslighting, and going me today, we have Tommy. How are you? I'm doing well, Brandon. How you
0:58.4	doing? I am doing well. Thank you for asking. And if you want to be a guest like Tommy is today,
1:05.2	please do go to our website at Narcissistapocalypse.com, click on the guest form button, fill out the form,
1:11.6	and press to submit button. We also have a support group at our website, so if you need support, join our support group
1:16.7	at Narcissistapocalypse.com. And today, we do have a content warning, as we do discuss physical
1:22.4	abuse in this episode. And today you're going to hear Tommy's story. And Tommy grew up as the scapegoat for his
1:30.2	father. And Tommy had to deal with humiliation, body shaming, physical abuse, expectations,
1:35.3	not being good enough, triangulation, gaslighting, circular conversations of logic. But his dad was just a
1:44.0	really mean, mean, mean person. And he really had
1:49.4	no right to be called a dad. He was just very power and control hungry. He was an abuser.
1:56.1	And it drove Tommy to addiction to cope with everything that was going on. And Tommy is in recovery now.
2:04.1	And I know his story will validate so many of you out there. So a big thank you to Tommy for
2:09.0	being here with us today. And now I'm going to get out of my way and your way. Tommy,
2:13.7	the floor is now yours.
2:25.4	My daily habit is to turn on Narcissus Apocalypse on the 45-minute drive to work every morning.
2:28.3	So this is kind of surreal.
2:34.5	So anyway, the relationship that I'm talking about is my father and I.
2:45.0	So as far as my father, if we could go back of what I know about his life growing up, because I think there's a lot hidden.
2:49.6	And you never really felt like you were getting a full story.
2:54.6	And you had to be careful what you said around my dad. For instance, I remember he had a black and white picture of his father, but he was dead.
3:01.6	When did he die?
	...

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