Hello, Tim. Welcome to the midroom.

Oh, la.

Ola.

Yeah.

Yeah.

How do I follow that?

Okay.

So I was a server at a very, very large restaurant in downtown Seattle.

Okay.

Hello, Jim. We lost you. Yeah yeah we got you now help they got me out i won't still i'm walking around volunteer park probably hit a dead spot um yes anyway so a button popped off my trousers

there were tight trousers and the differ wouldn't hold them up so i got some safety pens from

my co-worker put

safety pens in it did the trick um continued my shift i walked up to a table and this woman looks at me

and she says are you okay and i look what i look down and there is a blood circle like the size of a dinner

plate in my apron oh god dude did you did you did you my pants plate in my apron. Oh, God, dude.

Did you?

Soap through my apron.

And I saw it like, oh, crap.

Run to the bathroom and, uh, undo my pants and look.

And I kind of cradle my penis in my hand.

And I had a little, like, quarter inch, maybe a bigger slit.

Mm-hmm. Top of your penis.

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