We are Ken Jennings and John Roderick. We speak to you from our present, which we can

only assume is your distant past, the turbulent time that was the early 21st century.

Fearing the great cataclysm that will surely befall our civilization, we began this

monumental reference of strange and obscure human knowledge.

These recordings represent our attempt to compile and preserve wonders and esoterica that would otherwise be lost.

So whether you're listening from an advanced civilization or have just reinvented the technology to decrypt our transmissions,

this is our legacy to you.

This is our time capsule.

This is the omnibus. Oh, You have accessed entry 1306.

E.S. 0609, certificate number 959.

Ticker Tape Parades. When you finally concluded your amazing historic run on Jeopardy?

John, I'm blushing. Uh, did you receive a hero's welcome anywhere?

I was offered a hero's welcome in some Some kind of local Utah parade every little Utah municipality has something days in the summer

Pioneer days. Yeah, it's not just Utah. I'm sure here's strawberry days, here's whatever their thing is in that town.

Frontier days.

Frontier. And they said, well, we have this float with a massive styrofoam Ken Jennings.

Will you be on the parade waving?

Where does that foam Ken Jennings live now?

Thereby hangs a tail.

One of my great regrets is that I said no because I was kind of burned out on all the

Jeopardy media and I was trying to keep a low profile that month and I did not

want to be in sugar beet days or whatever it was and so I so they the the giant Ken Jennings styrofoam heads set sail without me did they just pick any random

...