Broadcasting from the Tuft & Needle Studio, it's Dave and Chuck the Freak.

Alright, two different things came out here. They asked people, one, the best and worst noises to make during sex.

And also worst things they've heard someone say during sex.

We'll start with the noises. Apparently when you lie there silent and perfectly still during sex, it's not a turn on.

So adjust your technique if that's your thing. They had men and women rank the seven most common noises you can make during sex.

From seven to one, worst to best. Silence. Silence is the worst. Silence is the worst noise you can make during sex. No noise at all.

Only 8% of men and 13% of women like silence during sex.

There's only one type of silence I can see myself actually enjoying. And that is like forced silence where you're really trying super hard to be silent.

And it's working but not quite. You know what I'm saying?

It's kind of like those chicks that there's like Asian porn where they're reading the news and they're trying not to act like they're gay.

Exactly. That type of thing like you're in, you know, I'm just going to mythically make up a porno scene right now.

But like two people are like in a closet. There's people on the outside of the room and they're banging.

But like try not to make any noise because if they make noise in the room, they're going to hear men and black. That's the only time like it be like a...

Trying not to let anyone hear you have sex. Exactly. That's like thrilling. A thrilling silence. That's the only thing I can see being sexy about silence.

Squeaking is next. This is the Asian style. Right. I know what you're saying. I'm squeaking. I know what you're saying now.

There's a squeaking. I can see the Asian chicks. I mean, I'm none, you know. I know what you're talking about.

20... 28% of men and 15% of women like it. But it's still one of the least like noises. Don't want my man to squeak.

Oh man! I can't even imagine a man squeak. I don't think they're in it. I mean...

Oh, hopefully not. Probably is. 15% of women like it. Hopefully they like it on themselves. Not on a man.

I don't know. No. God. No, I can't have a rat man squeaks. Not with a man squeaks, Andy.

Andy's man squeaks. That was shocking. I thought it came from over there. No.

I'm just a man squeaks. After my voice at Andy did.

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