meta_pixel
Tapesearch Logo
Log in
Church of Lazlo Podcasts

Thursday 2.26.26

Church of Lazlo Podcasts

Audacy

Comedy

4.91.7K Ratings

🗓️ 26 February 2026

⏱️ 123 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

If you ‘feel’ a diet coke, you’ve never smoked crack. Lazlo's son is ‘cats in the cradling,’ him. The Kansas Men's Basketball team (probably) knows where Baby Lisa is. Whores are people! SlimFast begs for a car. What is ghostlighting, and why does Lazlo and Slim love it? In Headlines, Lazlo and SlimFast discuss Bill Gates hooking up with Russian whores, CRAZY D4vd news, a guy poisoning his roommates with bug spray, and much much more! Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts!

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men.

0:11.0

Blessed is he who in the name of charity and goodwill shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness.

0:18.0

For he is truly his brother's keeper and finder of lost children.

0:23.6

And I will strike down upon me with great vengeance and furious anger, those who attempt

0:30.6

to poison and destroy my brothers.

0:34.6

And you will know my name is the lord when i lay my vengeance upon me ladies and gentlemen

0:43.2

the church of laslo has begun yeah how are you i'm great how are you get your breakfast

0:52.6

finished off there ridiculous man just a handful of drugs. No, it's... Some prescription, some not. A bottle of crate, I'm in a protein bar. It's breakfast. I mean, it must be nice to be young. When you're young, you know, sure, you can get by on a granola bar I guess when you get older you need a little

1:12.5

little more energy

1:14.0

it's a little harder to get moving

1:15.3

you know things slowed down

1:17.0

by the time

1:19.0

we're uh

1:19.7

you know but I got the expense of it

1:21.5

I got that David's energy bar thing man so

1:23.6

I don't even know what that is that's something

1:26.0

with like the nuts on

1:27.1

dried things one of those dried things.

1:28.6

One of those gross things?

1:30.0

It's not good.

1:30.8

It's fine. But it's got like 30 grams of protein in that one of those. It's not one of those. What are the ones? Oh, kind. Are those? Oh, yeah, no, yeah. Oh, I can't do that. I'm like, man,

1:42.0

Oh, if you mean, those are the delicious ones

...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Audacy, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Audacy and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.

Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.