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Church of Lazlo Podcasts

Thursday 2.12.26

Church of Lazlo Podcasts

Audacy

Comedy

4.91.7K Ratings

🗓️ 12 February 2026

⏱️ 122 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Lazlo and Chacho are ignoring doctors’ advice. Lazlo gives expert advice on how to get Slims’ wife out of the, “Why don't you have kids?” questions. Ace Hardware has AMAZING pies. With all of this Epstein and abduction news, did we forget about Minnesota? Lazlo has a heated opinion about the Norwegian who admitted to cheating on his girlfriend. RIP James Van Der Beek. Stream The Church of Lazlo podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts!

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men.

0:11.0

Blessed is he who in the name of charity and goodwill shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness.

0:18.0

For he is truly his brother's keeper and finder of lost children and I will

0:24.5

strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to

0:31.2

poison and destroy my brothers and you will know my name is the lord when i lay my vengeance upon me ladies and gentlemen

0:43.1

the church of laslow has begun yo what's going on oh nothing how are you i'm great no problem

0:51.9

good glad to hear it. How's your spine?

0:55.5

I will say that it's a little sore today.

0:59.7

That said, I did play golf again yesterday.

1:04.0

Hey.

1:04.9

So, but I think.

1:06.5

With Chacho?

1:07.5

I did.

1:08.6

And then when he got home, he was like, because I think one of us are really supposed to be playing.

1:13.3

Guys are a couple of golf and fools, man.

1:15.4

And the doctors were like, you know, you guys can chip and pot.

1:20.7

And then we're like, chip and pot.

1:23.6

Is that really mean?

1:24.9

Right.

1:25.5

Just take it kind of easy.

1:26.9

Is that? So we both played two days in a row. And then yesterday I was like, man, my back story's like, yeah, my hamstring and knees will. Oh, I was like, okay. Don't say it. Don't say it. I was like, all right, you know what? Let's take a day off. Maybe time to back off a little bit. a little bit yeah so follow a few of the doctor's

1:47.2

uh orders maybe that he was much better than me because he was like ah you know it's a little so

...

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