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Seeing Other People

This Mindset Shift Will Change Your (Dating) Life

Seeing Other People

Ilana Dunn

Relationships, Society & Culture, Sexuality, Health & Fitness, Mental Health, Social Sciences, Science

4.5608 Ratings

🗓️ 1 April 2025

⏱️ 52 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In this episode, I sit down with executive coach and author Keren Eldad to explore how the same perfectionism and overachievement that drive success can also sabotage our relationships. We discuss the trap of seeking external validation in dating, how people-pleasing can lead to unfulfilling connections, and why high achievers often struggle with vulnerability and intimacy. Keren shares powerful insights on breaking free from the need to "perform" in love, embracing authenticity, and building relationships that feel as good as they look on paper. If you've ever felt like you're chasing an ideal in dating rather than real connection, this conversation is for you.


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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

This podcast is brought to you by Podcast Nation.

0:06.1

Oh my God, you guys.

0:07.3

I am so, so excited for this conversation.

0:10.7

Right before we pressed record, I was like, Karen, there's so much that I want to talk to you about.

0:15.8

And I know we can't get to it all, but we're going to get to a lot of it.

0:19.4

Karen, Eldad, coach Karen, welcome to seeing other people.

0:22.5

Thank you so much. It's a pleasure to be here with you. I really am so honored to have you here and so

0:28.2

excited for this conversation. I think it's one that so many people need to hear. So for those who

0:32.3

don't know, Karen, she is a leading executive coach. She is the author of Gilded, which is all about breaking free from

0:38.7

the cage of ambition, perfectionism, and pursuing more. And this is something that is so

0:46.0

relatable to so many of us. I mean, in career, in our personal lives, in our dating lives,

0:52.1

like we all are so overambitious and sometimes our desire

0:58.4

for more is preventing us from seeing what we have. And sometimes we're not even sure if what we have

1:03.8

is what we want. So there's so much to dive into before we jump in headfirst. I would love for you to share a little bit of your story of

1:13.6

how you got here with the seeing other people family. Okay. It would be an immense pressure,

1:19.4

but first I wanted to add a couple of really important details for all the listeners. Number one,

1:24.1

I have married 23 couples. I take full responsibility for helping people reach the

1:29.7

consciousness that allows them to find unconditional love and to follow it through. I am also

1:34.3

responsible for people waking up to the fact that their marriage is dead and to correcting

1:39.1

the patterns in their dating life. This is extraordinarily important for me. Even an executive coach will tell you, anyone

1:46.7

worth their salt anyway, will tell you that if love ain't working, ain't nothing working, we have to

1:52.6

fix that first. The second thing I want to say is, tomorrow I am celebrating my seventh anniversary.

...

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